Musings on 30 Years of Marriage--2

These posts will make more sense when read in order!

(A reminder--this is all written from my perspective, not Jan's!)

In the fall of 1974 some school buddies and I decided to start a new band. Most of the people were Seniors. I was a Junior. Early on my brother Jeff, a sophomore at the time, joined as our main vocalist. I played bass guitar, trumpet, and a bit of piano. We called the group, Daybreak. We had some great musicians in the group, but for whatever reason, we never really jelled as a band. In fact, I think we only did one concert.

But that one concert changed everything...

For some reason, Jan attended the concert. Again, she really had no idea who I was. But her best friend was in our group, and her best friend...wanted me! (as I found out later). So she asked Jan to the concert to check me out.

During the concert we had a song that desperately needed a piano. But we had no competent piano players. So in the middle of the concert I asked Jan to come up and play (because I knew she was a keyboard player). It was goofy to do so--but it gives a sense of how unorganized we were as a band.

Anyway, Jan came up and played the song. That night we asked her to be in our band.

After rehearsals, Jan and I began talking to each other. She--in order to check me out for her friend. Me--for the pure joy of being in her presence.

(It might help to know that I was extremely shy! I was scared to death of Jan in part because I was crazy about her and in part because she was a year older than I was!)

The running joke in the band was that while the band had to put away all the equipment, Jan and I sat in a corner and talked.

I remember at one point she asked me if I would ever date a senior. I played coy and said that it depended on which senior. Jan later told me she was quickly getting the impression that I was not interested in her best friend but in Jan! Talk about a bind for Jan.

One night we had some friends over to the house including Jan. My dad was trying to set me up with one of Jan's friends. But my mom later told me she had a sense that it was Jan I was interested in, even though I barely talked to her.

It was becoming clear that something was going on between the two of us, but being shy and scared to death of ruining a good thing, I didn't do anything--literally. I just hung out with her but never made any gestures toward her.

One day, sitting in the lunch room, she asked me for my class ring. She started wearing it and gave me hers. People asked if we were going out, so to speak. I said I didn't think so. We just exchanged rings.

My buddy worked in the bookstore. So he let me and Jan hide out in the back. What a perfect place! And I didn't do anything! We talked alot. But in my mind it was not boyfriend/girlfriend stuff--yet.

Finally one day she asked me what we were doing on Friday night. Apparently we were going out on a date. But I still didn't know if we were now an item or not...