30 years! We made it. Quite a milestone.
Over the last several months Jan has been pouring hours of her life into Ancestry.com, researching my family and her family. She's about as far as she can go at this time and is putting a book together. On one of the pages she has a collage of pictures of the two of us: A picture of us in front of the Christmas Tree at Rockefeller Center as the snow falls; a picture of the two of us on camels in Petra, Jordan; a picture of the two of us on a hill overlooking Jerusalem; a picture of us by the Tower Bridge in London...
I looked at those pictures and thought, "We've had a good run, so far."
We've been blessed with one of those marriages where we have been in love since the day we were married. After 30 years we still like each other. We come from a long, interesting line of people. We have two marvelous kids who have married fantastic spouses. We've enjoyed amazing health. We've traveled the world together. We've been a part of two dynamic ministries.
It has been a good run, so far.
This afternoon we went over to Mike's and Amber's for our anniversary and a delicious meal from Arby's (I set up a romantic dinner for two on the beach on Maui a few weeks ago, so we had our big anniversary dinner then). I sat and rocked my little granddaughter, Clover.
It has been a good run, so far!
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Monday, August 24, 2009
Musings on 30 Years of Marriage--11
How do I love thee, let me count the ways...
Top 10 Things Jan Loves About Tim:
His humor
His quirkiness
His amazing grace and compassion toward others
His giftedness as a wordsmith
He cooks his own breakfast and cleans up after himself
He drives me places when I don't feel like driving
I couldn't have asked for a more amazing father and role model for my children
He loves the dogs as much as I do
He's adorable and totally in love with his baby granddaughter
He is devoted to, and absolutely loves me
Top 10 Things Tim Loves About Jan
She's loved me for better or for worse and while most has been better, the worse--like my struggles with anxiety--have demonstrated unconditional love on her part
She's downright beautiful...how did I ever end up with a babe?
She's creative--she loves music, she loves to sew, take photos, work on projects, etc
She cares about creating a wonder-filled and organized home
She's been as passionate about ministry as I have
She's been and continues to be a fantastic mom to our kids
She's been supportive of my stuff--like running marathons and biking
She makes me happy
She fits me like a glove
She loves me--that never ceases to stun, amaze, and delight me
Saturday, August 22, 2009
Musings on 30 Years of Marriage--10
In every life a little rain must fall...
You can't share life together without some clouds, rain, heartache, and pain. And we've had some in our lives.
There have been experiences of great loss.
While we were on internship Jan's grandma passed away (May 10, 1983). Jan flew up to Minneapolis with Alycia (a toddler) and Mike (just a couple of months old). A few years before she died she moved into a new place and essentially gave Jan her house.
In 1988 Jan's mom discovered, after some issues with her eye, that she had colon cancer. After three surgeries within five months it was evident that she was not going to live. So we began to make plans for Jan's dad. He had parkinson's disease and Jan's mom didn't want him living on his own. So they built us the house we currently live in--a house big enough to house our kids and Vic. Jan's mom passed away on April 21, 1989. She was in Phoenix so we had a chance to visit her often. We flew up to Minneapolis for the funeral. Phadoris was a woman of strong faith (and a strong will!). She traveled the mid-west singing and telling her story of faith. We butted heads at times, but we loved and respected each other. She was a great mom and grandma.
On October 24, 1989 my Grandma died. She was the only Grandma I knew. She and my mom were extremely close. Grandma helped raise us. She was a marvelous woman. Her last years were spent living with my parents as they cared for my Grandpa who had alzheimers. One day, now living in a care facility, my Grandma called up my dad and said, "Don, I can't do it anymore." He rushed over to the nursing home. When he walked in, Grandma sat down and died. I headed back to Minneapolis to speak at her funeral.
A few weeks later, November 5, 1989, my Grandpa died. Grandpa had a profound impact on my life. I wanted to be a pastor because of him. He was pretty aware during grandma's funeral. But the day after he didn't recognize any of us. But he always kept his good humor. I had the privilege of speaking at his funeral, too.
Jan's dad moved in with us after the funeral for Phadoris. Vic was a quiet man, who in spite of his parkinson's, was able to get around quite well. He didn't need much care. But it wasn't all that easy for him to live here (he wanted his independence) and it took away quite a bit of privacy for us. One day he started acting loopy, and as the day went on, it grew worse. We found out he had stopped taking his meds. Once he got stabilized, he decided he wanted to move out and we figured the best place was in a graded care facility. He hated it. So he bought two houses in Sun City, one for himself, and one across the backyard for his sister so that she could take care of him. It all worked out pretty well after that. One morning, November 15, 1993, after breakfast, Vic told his sister he was going to lie down for awhile. He never woke up. We held the funeral in Minneapolis. Vic was an extremely successful business man. He was very generous but quiet about it, as he was in most things. Jan and I have been extremely blessed as a result of his success and generosity, which is minor to the blessing he was to us a father, a father in law, and a grandpa.
A few years after Vic moved out, my parents, living in Minneapolis at the time, lost everything. We had to move them down here. Eventually they came to live in our home. Again, while it was good to have them here, it was also difficult for them and us. They had their own bedroom and den, but to get to the kitchen they always had to walk into our living area. We had virtually no privacy, and it did get wearing. We eventually were able to move them to a house in Sun City.
On February 18, 2007, my mom passed away. Jan and I, along with Jeff and Diane, were in Hawaii at the time. We lived through her last moments via phone updates. We were so grateful that so many people were with mom in her last moments, including my son and his wife. The funeral was held at the Zuni Hills Elementary School where we hold worship services for Grace. I was overwhelmed by the number of people who came out and by the numbers of people who were impacted by my mom.
We were fortunate in that we never had any broken bones in our immediate family. But we had some wounded emotions. I suffered my first major panic attack in 1988 while in California. I drove home in the middle of the night absolutely panicked for no reason I could think of. It began a long journey of ups and downs learning to be free of it.
Jan has struggled with depression--not debilitating, but challenging. Her med is her life-saver.
We went through some absolutely devastating years when Mike was a young teen into his teen years as he battled clinical depression. The process of finding him the right med was horrific for him and us. Mike had his first panic episode in New York City. It was so severe I had to fly out to bring him home. Those were dark, dark days. But he's a healthy young man today!
Alycia has also been blessed with some of our emotional stuff, lucky her. But she keeps pushing along, making a life for herself in spite of it.
My dad has had over 20 heart attacks in his 72 years, a major one coming in 1998, just a few weeks before we moved to our new church campus at Community Church of Joy. Amazingly, he's still here. A walking time bomb and walking miracle all in one.
Jan's brother, who lives up in Minneapolis, has faced severe challenges in his life since he was a kid, diabetes and seizures being at the root of them. In fact, he had his first seizure while driving on a freeway with Jan in the car when Jan was in 9th grade. Thankfully his foot let up on the gas and the car turned to the side. Jan was able to hit the brakes. Along with those medical challenges have been emotional ones as well.
The one constant has been the grace of God, sometimes powerfully felt, sometimes seemingly absent, walking with us through these times of life, getting us through and putting the pieces back together. I don't know how people face these kinds of things without God's presence.
You can't share life together without some clouds, rain, heartache, and pain. And we've had some in our lives.
There have been experiences of great loss.
While we were on internship Jan's grandma passed away (May 10, 1983). Jan flew up to Minneapolis with Alycia (a toddler) and Mike (just a couple of months old). A few years before she died she moved into a new place and essentially gave Jan her house.
In 1988 Jan's mom discovered, after some issues with her eye, that she had colon cancer. After three surgeries within five months it was evident that she was not going to live. So we began to make plans for Jan's dad. He had parkinson's disease and Jan's mom didn't want him living on his own. So they built us the house we currently live in--a house big enough to house our kids and Vic. Jan's mom passed away on April 21, 1989. She was in Phoenix so we had a chance to visit her often. We flew up to Minneapolis for the funeral. Phadoris was a woman of strong faith (and a strong will!). She traveled the mid-west singing and telling her story of faith. We butted heads at times, but we loved and respected each other. She was a great mom and grandma.
On October 24, 1989 my Grandma died. She was the only Grandma I knew. She and my mom were extremely close. Grandma helped raise us. She was a marvelous woman. Her last years were spent living with my parents as they cared for my Grandpa who had alzheimers. One day, now living in a care facility, my Grandma called up my dad and said, "Don, I can't do it anymore." He rushed over to the nursing home. When he walked in, Grandma sat down and died. I headed back to Minneapolis to speak at her funeral.
A few weeks later, November 5, 1989, my Grandpa died. Grandpa had a profound impact on my life. I wanted to be a pastor because of him. He was pretty aware during grandma's funeral. But the day after he didn't recognize any of us. But he always kept his good humor. I had the privilege of speaking at his funeral, too.
Jan's dad moved in with us after the funeral for Phadoris. Vic was a quiet man, who in spite of his parkinson's, was able to get around quite well. He didn't need much care. But it wasn't all that easy for him to live here (he wanted his independence) and it took away quite a bit of privacy for us. One day he started acting loopy, and as the day went on, it grew worse. We found out he had stopped taking his meds. Once he got stabilized, he decided he wanted to move out and we figured the best place was in a graded care facility. He hated it. So he bought two houses in Sun City, one for himself, and one across the backyard for his sister so that she could take care of him. It all worked out pretty well after that. One morning, November 15, 1993, after breakfast, Vic told his sister he was going to lie down for awhile. He never woke up. We held the funeral in Minneapolis. Vic was an extremely successful business man. He was very generous but quiet about it, as he was in most things. Jan and I have been extremely blessed as a result of his success and generosity, which is minor to the blessing he was to us a father, a father in law, and a grandpa.
A few years after Vic moved out, my parents, living in Minneapolis at the time, lost everything. We had to move them down here. Eventually they came to live in our home. Again, while it was good to have them here, it was also difficult for them and us. They had their own bedroom and den, but to get to the kitchen they always had to walk into our living area. We had virtually no privacy, and it did get wearing. We eventually were able to move them to a house in Sun City.
On February 18, 2007, my mom passed away. Jan and I, along with Jeff and Diane, were in Hawaii at the time. We lived through her last moments via phone updates. We were so grateful that so many people were with mom in her last moments, including my son and his wife. The funeral was held at the Zuni Hills Elementary School where we hold worship services for Grace. I was overwhelmed by the number of people who came out and by the numbers of people who were impacted by my mom.
We were fortunate in that we never had any broken bones in our immediate family. But we had some wounded emotions. I suffered my first major panic attack in 1988 while in California. I drove home in the middle of the night absolutely panicked for no reason I could think of. It began a long journey of ups and downs learning to be free of it.
Jan has struggled with depression--not debilitating, but challenging. Her med is her life-saver.
We went through some absolutely devastating years when Mike was a young teen into his teen years as he battled clinical depression. The process of finding him the right med was horrific for him and us. Mike had his first panic episode in New York City. It was so severe I had to fly out to bring him home. Those were dark, dark days. But he's a healthy young man today!
Alycia has also been blessed with some of our emotional stuff, lucky her. But she keeps pushing along, making a life for herself in spite of it.
My dad has had over 20 heart attacks in his 72 years, a major one coming in 1998, just a few weeks before we moved to our new church campus at Community Church of Joy. Amazingly, he's still here. A walking time bomb and walking miracle all in one.
Jan's brother, who lives up in Minneapolis, has faced severe challenges in his life since he was a kid, diabetes and seizures being at the root of them. In fact, he had his first seizure while driving on a freeway with Jan in the car when Jan was in 9th grade. Thankfully his foot let up on the gas and the car turned to the side. Jan was able to hit the brakes. Along with those medical challenges have been emotional ones as well.
The one constant has been the grace of God, sometimes powerfully felt, sometimes seemingly absent, walking with us through these times of life, getting us through and putting the pieces back together. I don't know how people face these kinds of things without God's presence.
Friday, August 21, 2009
Musings on 30 Years of Marriage--9
It's funny, when you think about highlights over 30 years, how difficult it is to remember any of them! So I'll just start writing and see what comes to mind. I'll bring Jan in as well.
The two biggest highlights:
June 18, 1980--Minneapolis. We had already been to the hospital in the early morning hours walking up and down the hallways after Jan thought her water had broken. But it was a false alarm. But later that day Jan was pretty sure the baby was coming. But this time we waited until the contractions were a bit closer together. That gave me a chance to see the whole General Hospital Episode. Because you know how those soaps are--miss an episode and you're completely lost because the story lines move so quickly. :) This, by the way, was during the Luke and Laura days.
That evening after about 6 hours of labor, Alycia Janelle Wright was born weighing in at about 6 pounds 9 oz. She was a beautiful baby from the moment she came out of the womb. And she was two weeks late!
March 3, 1983--Phoenix. The doctor had said that if the baby didn't come by Friday (2 weeks late!) we might have to induce. But on Friday, Jan rolled over and whispered in my ear, "We're going to have a baby." A call to Jan's mom to pick up Alycia, a call to church to cancel appointments, and we were off to the hospital--in a flood-weary Phoenix. We had been blasted with heavy rains, the water sometimes up to the car doors. But we made it safely and Michael Timothy Wright was born, weighing in at about 8 lbs 13 oz. No wonder Jan said this baby was a lot more work getting out than Alycia.
Others: In no particular order--
Our internship at Community Church of Joy and then our call to serve there turned out to be pivotal in our lives. (See Musings on 25 years of Ordination).
Starting Community of Grace in 2005 (see Musings on 25 years of Ordination).
Sitting in the front row, middle two seats at a Barry Manilow Concert in Vegas and having Barry reach down to me as the show ended to shake my hand. (I'm guessing he was probably a bit shocked to see a manly man sitting in the front row of one of his concerts and enjoying it!) He shook Jan's hand, too. It was Jan's birthday.
Buying our first dog, Santi, the Beagle. Buying her brother a year later, Saba the Dachshund. Better than kids!
We had a chance to do a lot of traveling, in part because of church (see Musings on 25 years of Ordination), but a few highlights from our personal travel: 3 days in a Long Boat (canal boat) down a canal in Scotland followed by a two day bike ride in the Cotswolds. 5 days in Aspen in December with Mike and Amber, then another 3 when we got snowed in. Lots of great trips to Disneyland and Disney World. Israel. Australia--what a fantastic country. Norway is breath-takingly beautiful. England (too many times to count). A December trip to NYC when it snowed and we enjoyed a horse-drawn carriage ride in Central Park with big, white snowflakes falling around us. The "Martin Luther" tour--seeing all the Luther sites in Germany. One of our favorite places is Salzburg. Communion at the Vatican with the Pope in the house! Alaskan Cruise. Hawaii!!!!! Lots of great memories for me running in those places. Some of my favorites--Hyde Park in London. The Salzburg River in Salzburg.
Jan and Mike jumping out of an airplane (I took the pictures from the safety below).
Meeting lots of cool people like Noel Paul Stookey (of Peter, Paul, and Mary) who liked to call Jan, Sparky. My close personal friend, BJ Thomas.
Renovating the house and having to live in the basement.
Getting a tatoo.
Lots of eating out--favorite foods including Italian and Italian and often Italian. And of course, the best of all, Peter Piper Pizza.
Watching our kids grow up.
Marrying my son, Mike, to his beautiful wife, Amber. Walking my daughter, Alycia, down the aisle and officiating at her wedding to her fantastic husband, Corey.
Christmas Eves at church (there usually through midnight.) One night, having gone to bed, I asked Jan if she felt anything under her pillow. She reached under, found a little box. She turned on the light, opened the box, and found a brand new diamond for her wedding ring (I had purchased it with royalties from my first book.) A very, very nice surprise.
The newest highlight: May 26, 2009, the birth of Clover Alia Wright, weighing in at 5 lbs 11 oz. The most beautiful granddaughter you've ever seen born to Mike and Amber. I said to Jan, it's amazing, in seeing Clover for the first time, how absolutely in love I am with her! Baptizing her (3 times! Once in a private family ceremony and at both services at Grace so that everyone could be a part of it).
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Musings on 30 Years of Marriage--8
Marriage is filled with all kinds of stuff (how's that for deep) from life-changing memorable moments to painful experiences to loss to everydayness--mostly everydayness.
It would be easy to start with the memorable and the painful, so I'll start with the everydayness:
We've been extremely blessed to really like and love each other. We fit each other well. I'm the decisive, take charge, big picture guy, Jan is the more pragmatic, detailed person. Jan is fantastic with running the finances, for example. I hate that stuff. I'm good at taking out the garbage. Jan doesn't like to make decisions. One of our running jokes is the amount of time Jan used to spend in the toilet paper section of the grocery store agonizing over which toilet paper to buy. Good thing I like to grocery shop. I do most of it. Jan loves keeping house. She loves making the place homey. I love my work and Jan has always been a partner with me in it.
We share common interests. We both love British Mysteries and dramas (I even like the Jane Austin type stuff.) We both love reading. We both have the same tastes in TV shows (currently shows like Burn Notice, House, Psych, any British Detective show, etc.) We both love movies. I love to research them before we go. Jan likes the surprise of having no idea what we're seeing until the movie starts.
We both love having the dogs sleeping in the bed with us. We like salads. We like to travel. On vacations we have no problem being in the same place and doing our own thing--usually sitting on the beach reading. We are comfortable in silence. And we are good at talking to each other.
Jan gets more beautiful each day. I get older each day. Good deal for me. Not so good for her. Good thing it's for better or for worse...
We both love being parents, though it was not always easy. And we're thrilled to be grandparents.
We both need to see the Chiropractor once a week. Me for my back. Jan for her neck.
We are both into the same kind of music. We fell in love to Barry Manilow and have been fans ever since.
We prefer David Letterman over Jay Leno by a mile, and choose Dave over Conan though Conan is pretty good.
We both pursue our own things as well. Jan does lots of creating, sewing, photography, etc. I'm good at taking out the garbage.
We both use Macs. We both are adamant that we won't receive emails on our phones but Jan did sign up to receive Tweets from our kids.
We both like to spend the secondary holidays (4th of July, Memorial Day, etc.) watching a favorite movie and getting to be early. We're almost always in bed by 9 on New Years Eve.
We love sunsets in Hawaii and bright, full moons. We enjoy trying to catch a glimpse of the Space Station as it zooms through the dark sky.
We've both read the Harry Potter Series.
We have some differences but none that ever negatively impacted our relationship.
For me, the essence of a good marriage is found in this everydayness. Loving each other in the normal moments of life. Those moments keep us sane in the memorable and painful moments of a marriage.
It would be easy to start with the memorable and the painful, so I'll start with the everydayness:
We've been extremely blessed to really like and love each other. We fit each other well. I'm the decisive, take charge, big picture guy, Jan is the more pragmatic, detailed person. Jan is fantastic with running the finances, for example. I hate that stuff. I'm good at taking out the garbage. Jan doesn't like to make decisions. One of our running jokes is the amount of time Jan used to spend in the toilet paper section of the grocery store agonizing over which toilet paper to buy. Good thing I like to grocery shop. I do most of it. Jan loves keeping house. She loves making the place homey. I love my work and Jan has always been a partner with me in it.
We share common interests. We both love British Mysteries and dramas (I even like the Jane Austin type stuff.) We both love reading. We both have the same tastes in TV shows (currently shows like Burn Notice, House, Psych, any British Detective show, etc.) We both love movies. I love to research them before we go. Jan likes the surprise of having no idea what we're seeing until the movie starts.
We both love having the dogs sleeping in the bed with us. We like salads. We like to travel. On vacations we have no problem being in the same place and doing our own thing--usually sitting on the beach reading. We are comfortable in silence. And we are good at talking to each other.
Jan gets more beautiful each day. I get older each day. Good deal for me. Not so good for her. Good thing it's for better or for worse...
We both love being parents, though it was not always easy. And we're thrilled to be grandparents.
We both need to see the Chiropractor once a week. Me for my back. Jan for her neck.
We are both into the same kind of music. We fell in love to Barry Manilow and have been fans ever since.
We prefer David Letterman over Jay Leno by a mile, and choose Dave over Conan though Conan is pretty good.
We both pursue our own things as well. Jan does lots of creating, sewing, photography, etc. I'm good at taking out the garbage.
We both use Macs. We both are adamant that we won't receive emails on our phones but Jan did sign up to receive Tweets from our kids.
We both like to spend the secondary holidays (4th of July, Memorial Day, etc.) watching a favorite movie and getting to be early. We're almost always in bed by 9 on New Years Eve.
We love sunsets in Hawaii and bright, full moons. We enjoy trying to catch a glimpse of the Space Station as it zooms through the dark sky.
We've both read the Harry Potter Series.
We have some differences but none that ever negatively impacted our relationship.
For me, the essence of a good marriage is found in this everydayness. Loving each other in the normal moments of life. Those moments keep us sane in the memorable and painful moments of a marriage.
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Musings on 30 Years of Marriage--7
After our wedding we moved into Jan's grandma's house. It was an old, small house. So small, that we had the bed in the bedroom and the dresser in the "living room" and another in the other bedroom. The bathroom was a toilet only with a tub upstairs--a ceiling so low I had to duck when I was up there. Jan's dad put a shower in the moldy, carpetless basement and we added a garage (a must in cold Minnesota winters.) It was small, but it was home.
Jan took a job at a nursing home as we knew we would be moving to Seattle, Washington so I could finish up my last two quarters of school starting January, 1980. It was the only place she could use her nursing degree knowing she'd be there just a few months.
Our plan was for Jan to put me through my final year of college and 4 years of seminary before we started a family. But precautions aside--in October we discovered that Jan's nagging sore throat was a pregnancy.
After our first Christmas as a married couple we moved to Washington. We stayed in a small apartment with rented furniture. At one point we were eating off of an ironing board. But again, we loved it.
Jan took a job at a nursing home. I would drop her off early in the morning and then head over to a dark, quiet campus to study. Then I'd pick up her up after work and she would basically crash for the rest of the day and I would study.
Because of her pregnancy, as I neared the end of school, Jan flew home. She happened to fly home the day Mount St. Helen's exploded. She was able to see if from the plane.
Two weeks later I graduated from LBI and Jeff and I drove back to Minneapolis.
On June 18, 1980 our first child, Alycia was born.
I started seminary--Bethel Seminary--in the fall and we moved into student housing on the campus. We were on the third floor and had to hand carry a piano up to the apartment so Jan would have something to play. But the piano was so crummy I don't think she ever used it.
Jan took a new job at a nursing home in St. Paul, working evenings. Living on the campus we were able to juggle caring for Alycia while Jan worked and I studied.
The following year I transfered to Luther Seminary. We moved back into Jan's grandma's house (which we actually owned but had rented out for awhile.) Jan took a new job at a new nursing home. It was a long ride for me into school every day but Jan worked evenings again. So I would usually come home from school and spend some time with Alycia. I would make her my speciality--a fried egg and peas. Then I'd take her to my mom's house so she could watch Alycia while I went back home to study. Then back to mom's to pick up Alycia. Jan would get home late and she and Alycia would watch David Letterman and MASH. One of Alycia's first words was MASH.
In August of 1982 we headed to Phoenix for a year of internship at Community Church of Joy. Jan was pregnant at the time and Mike was born on internship. So we had both of our kids before I graduated from school.
We lived in Sun City at Jan's parent's condo for a few months then Joy rented us a home across from the church during the months Jan's folks were in Phoenix. I had no idea how fast weeds grew here. I had no lawn mower or lawn equipment. By the time we moved back to Sun City our back yard was a forest of weeds. One of our last nights in the rented house we noticed a black widow spider by the door. We moved out immediately the next morning and headed back to the safe confines of Sun City.
Then it was back to Minneapolis to finish out school. For those lasts several months we lived in the basement of Jan's parent's house.
I graduated in March of 1984 and we headed back to Phoenix to begin ministry at Community Church of Joy (see musings on 25 years of ordination.)
Jan took a job at a nursing home as we knew we would be moving to Seattle, Washington so I could finish up my last two quarters of school starting January, 1980. It was the only place she could use her nursing degree knowing she'd be there just a few months.
Our plan was for Jan to put me through my final year of college and 4 years of seminary before we started a family. But precautions aside--in October we discovered that Jan's nagging sore throat was a pregnancy.
After our first Christmas as a married couple we moved to Washington. We stayed in a small apartment with rented furniture. At one point we were eating off of an ironing board. But again, we loved it.
Jan took a job at a nursing home. I would drop her off early in the morning and then head over to a dark, quiet campus to study. Then I'd pick up her up after work and she would basically crash for the rest of the day and I would study.
Because of her pregnancy, as I neared the end of school, Jan flew home. She happened to fly home the day Mount St. Helen's exploded. She was able to see if from the plane.
Two weeks later I graduated from LBI and Jeff and I drove back to Minneapolis.
On June 18, 1980 our first child, Alycia was born.
I started seminary--Bethel Seminary--in the fall and we moved into student housing on the campus. We were on the third floor and had to hand carry a piano up to the apartment so Jan would have something to play. But the piano was so crummy I don't think she ever used it.
Jan took a new job at a nursing home in St. Paul, working evenings. Living on the campus we were able to juggle caring for Alycia while Jan worked and I studied.
The following year I transfered to Luther Seminary. We moved back into Jan's grandma's house (which we actually owned but had rented out for awhile.) Jan took a new job at a new nursing home. It was a long ride for me into school every day but Jan worked evenings again. So I would usually come home from school and spend some time with Alycia. I would make her my speciality--a fried egg and peas. Then I'd take her to my mom's house so she could watch Alycia while I went back home to study. Then back to mom's to pick up Alycia. Jan would get home late and she and Alycia would watch David Letterman and MASH. One of Alycia's first words was MASH.
In August of 1982 we headed to Phoenix for a year of internship at Community Church of Joy. Jan was pregnant at the time and Mike was born on internship. So we had both of our kids before I graduated from school.
We lived in Sun City at Jan's parent's condo for a few months then Joy rented us a home across from the church during the months Jan's folks were in Phoenix. I had no idea how fast weeds grew here. I had no lawn mower or lawn equipment. By the time we moved back to Sun City our back yard was a forest of weeds. One of our last nights in the rented house we noticed a black widow spider by the door. We moved out immediately the next morning and headed back to the safe confines of Sun City.
Then it was back to Minneapolis to finish out school. For those lasts several months we lived in the basement of Jan's parent's house.
I graduated in March of 1984 and we headed back to Phoenix to begin ministry at Community Church of Joy (see musings on 25 years of ordination.)
Monday, August 17, 2009
Musings on 30 Years of Marriage--6
As is true for most weddings, it was an exciting, hectic time for us as we got ready for the big day. Jan finished up her final year of her nursing program and took the state boards while planning the wedding. I finished up another quarter of school, and because of summer school the previous year was able to take the summer and the following fall off. So I left my part time janitorial job to work full time as a janitor at a local hotel. The hours were not great. I had to be to work at 5 or 6 in the morning. The job wasn't great, either. So I quit and went to work for my dad. To be honest, he paid us, but we didn't have to work all that hard.
Jan did a fantastic job of putting the wedding together. She bought her wedding dress off of a sale rack. We were married at Jan's church and the reception was put on by the women's circle of the church, consisting of cake, pillow mints, punch, coffee, and some pasta type salads.
For my bachelor party we went bowling. We did the usual rehearsal and rehearsal dinner. And finally, it was time for the main event.
Our wedding was to take place at 7 pm on Saturday, August 25, 1979. Plenty of time for me to be nervous! In the morning I went to my hair sculpture-er to have her nice up my hair (I used to have a full--too full--head of hair). I ended up looking like a goof-ball! We took most of our pictures before the wedding, which was fun and a bit grueling at the same time.
My Grandfather assisted our pastor in the ceremony. My brother Jeff's band provided the wedding music. My college room mate shared a few thoughts.
Jan looked absolutely fantastic. The music was awesome. The whole ceremony was great fun. (Looking back at some of the pics, years later, especially the candids, we noticed some of the signs of Alzheimer's that my Grandpa developed later in life!)
Even though Jan's mom had been hesitant about her daughter marrying a pastor, she and her husband were totally supportive of the wedding, the marriage, and made much in our early married life happen financially.
Video technology was new back then. But we tried it anyway. A huge big video deck and camera. But when we saw the tape, it was all blank!
After the ceremony we did the receiving line. All I wanted to do was go to the bathroom, and then sit down! But it was not to be.
After the reception we headed to Jan's house with friends and family to open gifts. We finally got to the hotel about 1 or 2 in the morning!
We stayed in Minneapolis on Sunday as we attended a concert that night featuring Andrae' Crouch. One memorable moment: Andrae announced at one point: We understand Bob Dylan is in the audience tonight. Welcome to the family! This was right after Dylan announced he was a Christian.
We spent Sunday night in our house (more on that later) and on Monday headed up to Northern Minnesota to stay at a condo owned by Jan's dad's company--a resort called, Quadna. The thing was, it was after season so everything at the resort was closed. There was nothing to do. The big event turned out to be our drive over to Duluth and the boat ride around the harbor looking at Ore boats! We were so bored we went home early. Not the honeymoon we hoped for, so we've been doing a honeymoon every year since then.
With the wedding and honeymoon over, it was time to be a married couple.
Saturday, August 15, 2009
Musings on 30 Years of Marriage--5
We decided to get engaged in 1978. My dad took me and Jan over to a friend who owned a jewelry store. We picked out a ring that at that time cost a whopping $550! My dad paid the $50 down payment and we put it on a payment plan. I immediately went out and got a part time job working for the Commercial Building Maintenance company. (During most of High School I pumped gas--remember those days? During the 1974 gas crisis no less!) Now in college, my first janitor job was to clean a Good Year Tire office building--by myself. I cleaned out the ash trays (in the days when you could smoke in the building), cleaned desks, bathrooms, floors, did buffing, etc.
Very quickly I moved up the ranks and soon became a manager of a 4 story building and a small crew. The building: Minister's Life Insurance Company--how's that for irony.
We didn't say anything to Jan's family because Jan's brother was getting married in the summer of 1978. We decided to keep the pending engagement a secret until after her brother's wedding. But...
My brother Dave told his girl-friend at the time. She told a friend of hers whose family would be spending the weekend up at the lake with Jan's mom and dad. Not good. So Jan had to call and tell them over the phone that we had a ring. Jan's mom was not pleased!
The night of Jan's brother's wedding Jan's mom was trying to hook Jan up with a missionary to China!!! But after the wedding I asked Jan's dad for Jan's hand in marriage and he consented. We set the date for August 25, 1979. August is hot in Minneapolis so we prayed every day for great weather. God answered that prayer.
Very quickly I moved up the ranks and soon became a manager of a 4 story building and a small crew. The building: Minister's Life Insurance Company--how's that for irony.
We didn't say anything to Jan's family because Jan's brother was getting married in the summer of 1978. We decided to keep the pending engagement a secret until after her brother's wedding. But...
My brother Dave told his girl-friend at the time. She told a friend of hers whose family would be spending the weekend up at the lake with Jan's mom and dad. Not good. So Jan had to call and tell them over the phone that we had a ring. Jan's mom was not pleased!
The night of Jan's brother's wedding Jan's mom was trying to hook Jan up with a missionary to China!!! But after the wedding I asked Jan's dad for Jan's hand in marriage and he consented. We set the date for August 25, 1979. August is hot in Minneapolis so we prayed every day for great weather. God answered that prayer.
Friday, August 14, 2009
Musings on 30 Years of Marriage--4
(Jan thinks our first date was on January 31, 1975.)
Jan graduated from High School in May of 1975. From there she was headed to St. Olaf College, about a 40-60 minute drive from my house. She was going to get a BA in nursing.
We had a good summer but then came the hard part--being separated as she headed to school. There was some obvious dis-ease wondering if our relationship would last as it was fairly new. Plus, I was admittedly intimidated by all of those college boys she'd be hanging around.
Dropping her off at school was a toughie. It was a long ride back home (I drove her car home as, being a freshman, she couldn't have a car on campus. The car broke down about 3 miles from her house!) It was a few days later that it dawned on me that she was not that far away. I could visit her on weekends.
So that began weekend drives down to St. Olaf in Northfield, MN. While Jan was there we headed back to Minneapolis to attend our very first Barry Manilow Concert! He introduced songs from his soon to be released album, Trying to Get the Feeling. What a show. The first of many over the last 35 some years.
Jan didn't last long at St. Olaf. The program was a liberal arts degree with a small amount of nursing. So she left and enrolled at Mounds Midway School of Nursing in St. Paul--a three year RN program that got the students on the floor day 1. She loved it. (Good news for me--almost all girl students: no competition!)
That was also my final year of High School. Since most of my friends were Seniors the year before (including Jan) I wasn't sure how I'd get through my Senior Year. So in my Jr. year I ran for Student Body President (to be served the next year) and won. I had a very, very good Senior year--even better when Jan moved back home.
After I graduated I decided to attend the Lutheran Bible Institute in Seattle. That meant a real long distance relationship. It was tough. My family drove me out to Seattle and Jan came along. That last night was painful!!! Saying goodbye was even tougher. And each time I headed back to Seattle for another 3 months grew increasingly difficult.
LBI was known as the Lutheran Bridal Institute and many of my friends predicted that in no time I'd dump Jan and find someone else. But word got out quickly that I was hooked. The big, life-sized poster of Jan above my bed was the tip off.
This was in the day of no cell phones. Once a week I'd call Jan from the phone booth in the dorm. We literally spent hundreds of dollars a month on phone bills. And we'd write letters every day. Nothing better than getting a letter. Nothing worse than not getting one. I remember one week I didn't receive a letter the entire week. Not good. When you can't get instant information it's easy to start imagining the worst. But on Friday I received 5 letters!
Jan came out to visit for a week in the fall of my 4th quarter. It was so good to have her there. That's not to say I didn't enjoy my time at LBI. I loved every minute of it. But it was not easy.
We endured 4 quarters of that kind of separation until I couldn't take it anymore and I transferred back to Minneapolis.
Marriage was in the air, but Jan and her good friend moved into Jan's grandma's house (her grandma had moved into a retirement home). Jan and her friend figured they'd live there at least a year.
But then Jan's friend decided she was going to get married. That moved everything up. And one night, Jan proposed! (Good thing, because I still wasn't sure if we were an item or not! :))
Jan graduated from High School in May of 1975. From there she was headed to St. Olaf College, about a 40-60 minute drive from my house. She was going to get a BA in nursing.
We had a good summer but then came the hard part--being separated as she headed to school. There was some obvious dis-ease wondering if our relationship would last as it was fairly new. Plus, I was admittedly intimidated by all of those college boys she'd be hanging around.
Dropping her off at school was a toughie. It was a long ride back home (I drove her car home as, being a freshman, she couldn't have a car on campus. The car broke down about 3 miles from her house!) It was a few days later that it dawned on me that she was not that far away. I could visit her on weekends.
So that began weekend drives down to St. Olaf in Northfield, MN. While Jan was there we headed back to Minneapolis to attend our very first Barry Manilow Concert! He introduced songs from his soon to be released album, Trying to Get the Feeling. What a show. The first of many over the last 35 some years.
Jan didn't last long at St. Olaf. The program was a liberal arts degree with a small amount of nursing. So she left and enrolled at Mounds Midway School of Nursing in St. Paul--a three year RN program that got the students on the floor day 1. She loved it. (Good news for me--almost all girl students: no competition!)
That was also my final year of High School. Since most of my friends were Seniors the year before (including Jan) I wasn't sure how I'd get through my Senior Year. So in my Jr. year I ran for Student Body President (to be served the next year) and won. I had a very, very good Senior year--even better when Jan moved back home.
After I graduated I decided to attend the Lutheran Bible Institute in Seattle. That meant a real long distance relationship. It was tough. My family drove me out to Seattle and Jan came along. That last night was painful!!! Saying goodbye was even tougher. And each time I headed back to Seattle for another 3 months grew increasingly difficult.
LBI was known as the Lutheran Bridal Institute and many of my friends predicted that in no time I'd dump Jan and find someone else. But word got out quickly that I was hooked. The big, life-sized poster of Jan above my bed was the tip off.
This was in the day of no cell phones. Once a week I'd call Jan from the phone booth in the dorm. We literally spent hundreds of dollars a month on phone bills. And we'd write letters every day. Nothing better than getting a letter. Nothing worse than not getting one. I remember one week I didn't receive a letter the entire week. Not good. When you can't get instant information it's easy to start imagining the worst. But on Friday I received 5 letters!
Jan came out to visit for a week in the fall of my 4th quarter. It was so good to have her there. That's not to say I didn't enjoy my time at LBI. I loved every minute of it. But it was not easy.
We endured 4 quarters of that kind of separation until I couldn't take it anymore and I transferred back to Minneapolis.
Marriage was in the air, but Jan and her good friend moved into Jan's grandma's house (her grandma had moved into a retirement home). Jan and her friend figured they'd live there at least a year.
But then Jan's friend decided she was going to get married. That moved everything up. And one night, Jan proposed! (Good thing, because I still wasn't sure if we were an item or not! :))
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Musings on 30 Years of Marriage--3
So...Jan finally asked me out! If she hadn't, we'd probably still be dating and I'd still be wondering if she liked me!
Friday night I had a commitment--our High School band was playing at an A-squad Basketball Team home game which was being broadcast on a Christian Radio Station (KTIS). I had a trumpet solo. We were concert band, not a pep or marching band, so we had to improvise a bit.
I decided I would take Jan to the game and then a movie afterwards.
I arranged to pick up her up at her house (and I had to--got to--meet her parents).
However, my mom made me drive Jeff and his friend Arnie to the game, which meant I had to pick up Jan for our first date with Jeff and Arnie in tow. Very cool! :(
The three of us headed into Jan's house where I met her mom and dad for the first time. I was nervous enough taking Jan out let alone having to meet her folks. But, all in all, it went ok. They really liked Jeff!
We went to the game where I was able to dump Jeff and Arnie. After the game we headed downtown Minneapolis to catch a movie (this was before the days of the multi-plex explosion). We had two options for a movie: A new Dean Martin movie, something like Ricco? where he played a lawyer? or Young Frankenstein. I'd already seen Young Frankenstein (and it turns out no one saw the new Dean Martin movie) so we took in Young Frankenstein. When you see that movie with your high school friends you perceive the humor one way. When you're out on your first date you see it in a far different light--a more uncomfortable light! But we both enjoyed it.
I took Jan home. We hung out awhile. I got home past my curfew. A trend that would continue for a few weeks until I was grounded!
The next night we headed out to what used to be the Met Sports Center--now the Mega Mall-- and home of the once Minnesota Northstars hockey team, now the Dallas Stars. My Grandfather's organization, The Lutheran Evangelistic Movement (LEM) was hosting their annual youth conference. My folks encouraged us to attend as they wanted us to hear and meet a new, young evangelist named Tom Eggum. Tom and I became friends and he eventually came to work with us at Joy.
After the meeting I took Jan home. We hung out awhile. And I got home past my curfew...
That weekend, January 24-25, 1975, began a five year dating experience which eventually lead to marriage...but I get ahead of myself.
PS--I just looked up the Dean Martin Movie. It was called, Mr. Ricco. How's that for a memory!!! Not bad for a middle-aged guy.
Friday night I had a commitment--our High School band was playing at an A-squad Basketball Team home game which was being broadcast on a Christian Radio Station (KTIS). I had a trumpet solo. We were concert band, not a pep or marching band, so we had to improvise a bit.
I decided I would take Jan to the game and then a movie afterwards.
I arranged to pick up her up at her house (and I had to--got to--meet her parents).
However, my mom made me drive Jeff and his friend Arnie to the game, which meant I had to pick up Jan for our first date with Jeff and Arnie in tow. Very cool! :(
The three of us headed into Jan's house where I met her mom and dad for the first time. I was nervous enough taking Jan out let alone having to meet her folks. But, all in all, it went ok. They really liked Jeff!
We went to the game where I was able to dump Jeff and Arnie. After the game we headed downtown Minneapolis to catch a movie (this was before the days of the multi-plex explosion). We had two options for a movie: A new Dean Martin movie, something like Ricco? where he played a lawyer? or Young Frankenstein. I'd already seen Young Frankenstein (and it turns out no one saw the new Dean Martin movie) so we took in Young Frankenstein. When you see that movie with your high school friends you perceive the humor one way. When you're out on your first date you see it in a far different light--a more uncomfortable light! But we both enjoyed it.
I took Jan home. We hung out awhile. I got home past my curfew. A trend that would continue for a few weeks until I was grounded!
The next night we headed out to what used to be the Met Sports Center--now the Mega Mall-- and home of the once Minnesota Northstars hockey team, now the Dallas Stars. My Grandfather's organization, The Lutheran Evangelistic Movement (LEM) was hosting their annual youth conference. My folks encouraged us to attend as they wanted us to hear and meet a new, young evangelist named Tom Eggum. Tom and I became friends and he eventually came to work with us at Joy.
After the meeting I took Jan home. We hung out awhile. And I got home past my curfew...
That weekend, January 24-25, 1975, began a five year dating experience which eventually lead to marriage...but I get ahead of myself.
PS--I just looked up the Dean Martin Movie. It was called, Mr. Ricco. How's that for a memory!!! Not bad for a middle-aged guy.
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Musings on 30 Years of Marriage--2
These posts will make more sense when read in order!
(A reminder--this is all written from my perspective, not Jan's!)
In the fall of 1974 some school buddies and I decided to start a new band. Most of the people were Seniors. I was a Junior. Early on my brother Jeff, a sophomore at the time, joined as our main vocalist. I played bass guitar, trumpet, and a bit of piano. We called the group, Daybreak. We had some great musicians in the group, but for whatever reason, we never really jelled as a band. In fact, I think we only did one concert.
But that one concert changed everything...
For some reason, Jan attended the concert. Again, she really had no idea who I was. But her best friend was in our group, and her best friend...wanted me! (as I found out later). So she asked Jan to the concert to check me out.
During the concert we had a song that desperately needed a piano. But we had no competent piano players. So in the middle of the concert I asked Jan to come up and play (because I knew she was a keyboard player). It was goofy to do so--but it gives a sense of how unorganized we were as a band.
Anyway, Jan came up and played the song. That night we asked her to be in our band.
After rehearsals, Jan and I began talking to each other. She--in order to check me out for her friend. Me--for the pure joy of being in her presence.
(It might help to know that I was extremely shy! I was scared to death of Jan in part because I was crazy about her and in part because she was a year older than I was!)
The running joke in the band was that while the band had to put away all the equipment, Jan and I sat in a corner and talked.
I remember at one point she asked me if I would ever date a senior. I played coy and said that it depended on which senior. Jan later told me she was quickly getting the impression that I was not interested in her best friend but in Jan! Talk about a bind for Jan.
One night we had some friends over to the house including Jan. My dad was trying to set me up with one of Jan's friends. But my mom later told me she had a sense that it was Jan I was interested in, even though I barely talked to her.
It was becoming clear that something was going on between the two of us, but being shy and scared to death of ruining a good thing, I didn't do anything--literally. I just hung out with her but never made any gestures toward her.
One day, sitting in the lunch room, she asked me for my class ring. She started wearing it and gave me hers. People asked if we were going out, so to speak. I said I didn't think so. We just exchanged rings.
My buddy worked in the bookstore. So he let me and Jan hide out in the back. What a perfect place! And I didn't do anything! We talked alot. But in my mind it was not boyfriend/girlfriend stuff--yet.
Finally one day she asked me what we were doing on Friday night. Apparently we were going out on a date. But I still didn't know if we were now an item or not...
(A reminder--this is all written from my perspective, not Jan's!)
In the fall of 1974 some school buddies and I decided to start a new band. Most of the people were Seniors. I was a Junior. Early on my brother Jeff, a sophomore at the time, joined as our main vocalist. I played bass guitar, trumpet, and a bit of piano. We called the group, Daybreak. We had some great musicians in the group, but for whatever reason, we never really jelled as a band. In fact, I think we only did one concert.
But that one concert changed everything...
For some reason, Jan attended the concert. Again, she really had no idea who I was. But her best friend was in our group, and her best friend...wanted me! (as I found out later). So she asked Jan to the concert to check me out.
During the concert we had a song that desperately needed a piano. But we had no competent piano players. So in the middle of the concert I asked Jan to come up and play (because I knew she was a keyboard player). It was goofy to do so--but it gives a sense of how unorganized we were as a band.
Anyway, Jan came up and played the song. That night we asked her to be in our band.
After rehearsals, Jan and I began talking to each other. She--in order to check me out for her friend. Me--for the pure joy of being in her presence.
(It might help to know that I was extremely shy! I was scared to death of Jan in part because I was crazy about her and in part because she was a year older than I was!)
The running joke in the band was that while the band had to put away all the equipment, Jan and I sat in a corner and talked.
I remember at one point she asked me if I would ever date a senior. I played coy and said that it depended on which senior. Jan later told me she was quickly getting the impression that I was not interested in her best friend but in Jan! Talk about a bind for Jan.
One night we had some friends over to the house including Jan. My dad was trying to set me up with one of Jan's friends. But my mom later told me she had a sense that it was Jan I was interested in, even though I barely talked to her.
It was becoming clear that something was going on between the two of us, but being shy and scared to death of ruining a good thing, I didn't do anything--literally. I just hung out with her but never made any gestures toward her.
One day, sitting in the lunch room, she asked me for my class ring. She started wearing it and gave me hers. People asked if we were going out, so to speak. I said I didn't think so. We just exchanged rings.
My buddy worked in the bookstore. So he let me and Jan hide out in the back. What a perfect place! And I didn't do anything! We talked alot. But in my mind it was not boyfriend/girlfriend stuff--yet.
Finally one day she asked me what we were doing on Friday night. Apparently we were going out on a date. But I still didn't know if we were now an item or not...
Musings on 30 Years of Marriage--1
On August 25, 2009 Jan and I will celebrate 30 years of marriage. So I thought it would be good to chronicle some of our life together over 30 years.
So...let's start at the very beginning, a very good place to start...
We're talking memories from 10th grade in high school so who knows how accurate they really are?
I first noticed Jan when I started 10th grade. We were both attending a Christian High School, Minnehaha Academy. Jan was a year ahead of me.
I was a part of the school choir, called, MA Singers, as was Jan. Almost no 10th grade girls ever made it into Singers but a few of us 10th grade boys did.
I sat in the back with the rest of the baritones. Jan sat up in the front with the altos. Being a young, testosterone-charged 10th grader, it was not beyond me to notice girls, and I noticed Jan right away. Her long blonde hair, her cat-like eyes caught my attention. She, on the other hand, had no idea I existed.
I had a girl friend at the time. But that didn't keep me from observing other girls. I wasn't married after all.
Some early memories: Andrae' Crouch, a famous Gospel singer, was in concert at a downtown church called, Souls Harbor. I attended the concert with someone, I don't remember who, perhaps my girlfriend at the time??? Anyway, I spotted Jan at the concert. Again, she had no idea I existed.
The following Monday, in the choir room, there were just a handful of us as we waited for the other students to arrive. I was sitting in the back. Down the row from me was my girlfriend's brother. He had been at the concert as well. And in the front row was Jan, who had no idea I existed. So I very loudly called across the room to my girlfriend's brother and asked him how he liked the Andrae Crouch concert, hoping Jan would chime in. It worked. She turned around and we all talked about the concert for awhile. Then it was time for choir to begin. I got her attention. But still had the sense that she had no idea who I was.
Another memory: In choir I sat next to a guy who was a Senior. He was a fun guy, but a real goofball. Not the kind of guy who would attract the ladies, so to speak. Every spring our school held a banquet for Jrs and Srs called, JS. We couldn't dance at our school (a vertical expression of a horizontal idea!) so we had banquets instead. So this guy tells me he's taking Jan (who was a Junior) to JS. I couldn't believe it. What in the world was this sophisticated woman doing going out with this goofball? Nevertheless, I lived vicariously through him. He showed us pictures from the big event. I was relived to hear they weren't an item. Still...I had to do some mental gymnastics to try to figure out why she had gone out with him in the first place. And she still had no idea I existed.
Another memory: This was the fall of 1975, Jan's senior year, my junior year. The Jr's and Senior's did a fall boat trip down the Mississippi River. I can still remember what Jan was wearing--Jeans, a hoodie-sweatshirt, and a cap (not a baseball cap, but more of a driving cap.) I can remember this because there's a picture of her in our yearbook from the River trip. But I think I would have remembered anyway. (My timing is a bit confused by I believe this was around the time I broke up with my girlfriend. We weren't doing well anyway. I took her to homecoming but it was a big bust! She actually went home with someone else!)
I continued to lust after Jan from afar. But that all changed in January of 1975...
So...let's start at the very beginning, a very good place to start...
We're talking memories from 10th grade in high school so who knows how accurate they really are?
I first noticed Jan when I started 10th grade. We were both attending a Christian High School, Minnehaha Academy. Jan was a year ahead of me.
I was a part of the school choir, called, MA Singers, as was Jan. Almost no 10th grade girls ever made it into Singers but a few of us 10th grade boys did.
I sat in the back with the rest of the baritones. Jan sat up in the front with the altos. Being a young, testosterone-charged 10th grader, it was not beyond me to notice girls, and I noticed Jan right away. Her long blonde hair, her cat-like eyes caught my attention. She, on the other hand, had no idea I existed.
I had a girl friend at the time. But that didn't keep me from observing other girls. I wasn't married after all.
Some early memories: Andrae' Crouch, a famous Gospel singer, was in concert at a downtown church called, Souls Harbor. I attended the concert with someone, I don't remember who, perhaps my girlfriend at the time??? Anyway, I spotted Jan at the concert. Again, she had no idea I existed.
The following Monday, in the choir room, there were just a handful of us as we waited for the other students to arrive. I was sitting in the back. Down the row from me was my girlfriend's brother. He had been at the concert as well. And in the front row was Jan, who had no idea I existed. So I very loudly called across the room to my girlfriend's brother and asked him how he liked the Andrae Crouch concert, hoping Jan would chime in. It worked. She turned around and we all talked about the concert for awhile. Then it was time for choir to begin. I got her attention. But still had the sense that she had no idea who I was.
Another memory: In choir I sat next to a guy who was a Senior. He was a fun guy, but a real goofball. Not the kind of guy who would attract the ladies, so to speak. Every spring our school held a banquet for Jrs and Srs called, JS. We couldn't dance at our school (a vertical expression of a horizontal idea!) so we had banquets instead. So this guy tells me he's taking Jan (who was a Junior) to JS. I couldn't believe it. What in the world was this sophisticated woman doing going out with this goofball? Nevertheless, I lived vicariously through him. He showed us pictures from the big event. I was relived to hear they weren't an item. Still...I had to do some mental gymnastics to try to figure out why she had gone out with him in the first place. And she still had no idea I existed.
Another memory: This was the fall of 1975, Jan's senior year, my junior year. The Jr's and Senior's did a fall boat trip down the Mississippi River. I can still remember what Jan was wearing--Jeans, a hoodie-sweatshirt, and a cap (not a baseball cap, but more of a driving cap.) I can remember this because there's a picture of her in our yearbook from the River trip. But I think I would have remembered anyway. (My timing is a bit confused by I believe this was around the time I broke up with my girlfriend. We weren't doing well anyway. I took her to homecoming but it was a big bust! She actually went home with someone else!)
I continued to lust after Jan from afar. But that all changed in January of 1975...
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Our Associate Pastor Moves On
Pastor Brian joined our staff 3 years ago. When I was up in Minneapolis interviewing candidates several years ago, he by far stood head and shoulders above the rest. There was no doubt in my mind that he was the guy for Grace.
When we called Brian it was with the thought that he might plant a new congregation out of Grace. For the last 12 months or so we've had that conversation from time to time. Little did we know that God had a surprise in store for us. As Brian and I were talking about what it might look like for him to begin a new congregation he received an invitation to interview at Wartburg College in Waverly, Iowa. No surprise--they loved him and called him to be their campus pastor.
Brian will be greatly missed. And his new call leaves some holes to fill at Grace.
I've been asked several times already if we're going to find a new associate. The answer, simply put, is: Not for the foreseeable future. One of the things both Brian and I have been mulling over is how to downplay professional church workers and up-play the gifts and talents within the laity. So rather than hire another professional church type, we're going to start putting our mulling into action. A few of our staff will help carry some of the load, but I'm eager to see what leaders will emerge from within our congregation.
As I dream about my final third of ministry, one of my priorities is to find ways to increasingly invite more and more of our laity into the joy and significance of mission. There are gifts sitting in the chairs each Sunday waiting to be used. We've got a lot of people already doing significant mission. From my perspective, the more the merrier.
So over the next months and years we'll watch together as God raises up talented, gifted people from within Grace to lead, support, and serve the mission of Grace.
When we called Brian it was with the thought that he might plant a new congregation out of Grace. For the last 12 months or so we've had that conversation from time to time. Little did we know that God had a surprise in store for us. As Brian and I were talking about what it might look like for him to begin a new congregation he received an invitation to interview at Wartburg College in Waverly, Iowa. No surprise--they loved him and called him to be their campus pastor.
Brian will be greatly missed. And his new call leaves some holes to fill at Grace.
I've been asked several times already if we're going to find a new associate. The answer, simply put, is: Not for the foreseeable future. One of the things both Brian and I have been mulling over is how to downplay professional church workers and up-play the gifts and talents within the laity. So rather than hire another professional church type, we're going to start putting our mulling into action. A few of our staff will help carry some of the load, but I'm eager to see what leaders will emerge from within our congregation.
As I dream about my final third of ministry, one of my priorities is to find ways to increasingly invite more and more of our laity into the joy and significance of mission. There are gifts sitting in the chairs each Sunday waiting to be used. We've got a lot of people already doing significant mission. From my perspective, the more the merrier.
So over the next months and years we'll watch together as God raises up talented, gifted people from within Grace to lead, support, and serve the mission of Grace.
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Changing of the generations
25 years ago, back in 1984, at the young age of 26, I started, at Pastor Walt Kallestad's request, a new worship experience geared to people in my age group at Community Church of Joy. With the help of Jeff, Diane, and my wife Jan, among others, we launched a new band we called, The Good News Band." The band consisted of drums, bass guitar, lead guitar, rhythm guitar, keys, and vocalists. It was a long way from the organ my mom played each Sunday in church. The music was contemporary, using the styles and sounds my generation was raised on--high energy pop, pop ballads, rock and roll, etc. At that time it was a radically new way to do worship, especially in more traditional church settings. We used the latest in worship choruses, but more than that, we tried to use music that everyday people were listening to on the radio and integrating it into the message for the day.
While the music has changed, and the musicians have come and gone, 25 years later Jeff is still singing, Diane sings occasionally but now prefers to be behind the scenes, Jan is still playing keys, and Duon is still on the drums. And they still have it! And they will continue, along with Tony and others, to bring us great worship.
But it's also time for the next 26 year olds to start taking the lead for their generation. And we have a batch of talented young adults ready and eager to do some new things in worship to reach their generation, from music to communion to how the message is presented.
On June 28 at the 10:45 service the young adults (plus yours truly--the old guy) will be offering the worship experience. It will feature their age group leading the music, serving communion, leading the service, etc. This will be an experiment, one we hope to continue once a month during the summer. It will also be a work in process. But I suspect it's an experience whose time has come.
I also suspect, that as happened 25 years ago, not only will young adults enjoy this new worship expression, but some of us older people might as well.
We will probably ease into it a bit the first time out--but who knows (and we shouldn't assume this will be a screaming, loud rock concert. Their music is as diverse as is/was ours!). I am confident that it will be a rewarding, enriching experience. I've been spending time with a core group of our young adults and they are pretty amped about this.
So I invite you to try it out if you'd like. I invite you to keep this new venture in your prayers. And I invite you to tell your friends.
While the music has changed, and the musicians have come and gone, 25 years later Jeff is still singing, Diane sings occasionally but now prefers to be behind the scenes, Jan is still playing keys, and Duon is still on the drums. And they still have it! And they will continue, along with Tony and others, to bring us great worship.
But it's also time for the next 26 year olds to start taking the lead for their generation. And we have a batch of talented young adults ready and eager to do some new things in worship to reach their generation, from music to communion to how the message is presented.
On June 28 at the 10:45 service the young adults (plus yours truly--the old guy) will be offering the worship experience. It will feature their age group leading the music, serving communion, leading the service, etc. This will be an experiment, one we hope to continue once a month during the summer. It will also be a work in process. But I suspect it's an experience whose time has come.
I also suspect, that as happened 25 years ago, not only will young adults enjoy this new worship expression, but some of us older people might as well.
We will probably ease into it a bit the first time out--but who knows (and we shouldn't assume this will be a screaming, loud rock concert. Their music is as diverse as is/was ours!). I am confident that it will be a rewarding, enriching experience. I've been spending time with a core group of our young adults and they are pretty amped about this.
So I invite you to try it out if you'd like. I invite you to keep this new venture in your prayers. And I invite you to tell your friends.
Monday, June 1, 2009
God's Sense of Irony
As I was watching my son carrying his daughter from the hospital out to the car two days after she was born--watching him all tatted up, his pants half-way down his butt, a winter stocking-cap on his head in 100 degree weather--it hit me! I used to see young dads who looked like him and thought to myself, "Seriously, this guy is going to raise a kid!?!"
The jokes on me. That guy is my son! And I couldn't be prouder! And I couldn't be more confident that he's going to be a great dad!
Clover Update
Clover is headed home! The biopsy came back negative and she pooped today. So all is well.
Mom and Dad are beat! Grandpa, on the other hand, is very, very happy!
Sunday, May 31, 2009
Sunday, May 31 stuff
It's been quite a few days:
Our little Grandbaby Clover--beautiful and perfect by the way--has been having trouble (to put this delicately) pooping. She's pooped once since she was born. The hospital had hoped for two poops (I'm trying to set a blogging record for writing poop or a form thereof), but after staying an extra day they told mom and dad not to worry about it and to call their Pediatrician if something didn't move, so to speak, by Friday. Nothing moved. The doctor said not to worry and wait until Monday, unless she started vomiting. She started vomiting on Saturday. Another call to the doctor. This time the doctor said she needed to go to Phoenix Children's Hospital. Needless to say, Mom Amber was pretty shaken. So were we all.
After waiting several hours my son called to say the news was not great. Clover had no blockage or infection, but the x-ray found a small spot. They suspected a somewhat rare condition in which a part of the intestine is virtually paralyzed, making it tough to poop. To verify their suspicion they needed to keep her overnight and run some tests today.
I had the chance to watch my son do some quick manning-up. He took charge by doing what dad's do best--He convinced his wife to go home and rest (since she hadn't slept since Tuesday!) and remained calm through it all. Thankfully Amber's mom was able to spend the night with Clover in the hospital.
Personally, I wasn't sure I'd be mentally in the game for worship today. But I slept well and the hospital didn't run the tests until the late morning.
It was a good day for me to be in worship--to sing songs of hope and God's power, to be with my faith family in a time of uncertainty. And I'm really enjoying this new series so while a bit distracted, God got us through.
This afternoon we received word that they had done a biopsy on little Clover. While we won't know the results until tomorrow, things look a bit better. It may be that their original suspicion is not correct. In fact, the doctors are hopeful that by tomorrow she may start pooping on her own.
As for me, I'm a bit pooped myself.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Musings on becoming a Grandpa
On Tuesday, May 26 (my dad's 73rd Birthday) my son, Mike, and his wife, Amber, gave birth to Clover Alia Wright. In an instant (seemingly!) I became a Grandpa for the first time. She weighed in at 5 lbs 12 oz. 19 inches long.
Impressions:
Sitting in the waiting room with some family and friends doing what you do in a waiting room--waiting!
Receiving texts from Amber's mom giving us blow by blow updates as Clover began her journey from mom's womb to the doctor's hands.
Hearing the little lullaby playing on the waiting room speakers announcing that another baby had been born--and the goosebumps that came knowing my grandchild had just been born.
Waiting, and waiting, and waiting to hear if it was a boy or a girl.
Watching the crowd huddled outside the door cheer when Mike announced it was a girl.
Seeing the tears in Jan's eyes.
Mike's first words to Jan (as told to me by Jan): "Mom, she's so beautiful!" (That would explain the tears in Jan's eyes!)
Bear-hugging my boy!
Seeing Clover for the first time.
Seeing Mike holding her for the first time!
Watching Jan hold her for the first time!
Holding her for the first time.
Watching my dad hold her for the first time!
Buying her her first gifts--A baseball that says, "It's a girl!" Pink Bubble-Gum Cigars. A tiny, tiny little shirt.
Talking to Mike, who had to go to school that evening, hearing him say he could hardly wait to get back to the hospital.
Knowing Mike now knows!
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Sunday's Message (May 24)-The Rest of the Story
For a holiday weekend I was pleased with the number of people who came for worship! It was another good Sunday.
This morning we looked at the story from Luke 8 where Jesus goes to the other side of the lake to rescue a man taken hostage by demons.
Here's the rest of the story: The now-freed man begs Jesus to take him along with the rest of Jesus' disciples. But Jesus tells the man to stay where he is; to go home and tell everyone about how much God has done for him.
When Jesus returned to that area later on, rather than being run out of town as he was in Luke 8, this time around the people were eager to meet him, see him, and listen to him. We can assume, and it is more than an assumption, that the freed man did what Jesus told him to do. He told people about how Jesus had rescued him. And, hearing the story, the people now wanted to see Jesus for themselves.
Deeply simple--tell our friends, our families, our neighbors, our co-workers how much God has done for us. Many of them will want to see, meet, and follow Jesus themselves. It only takes one story-teller to change a city.
This morning we looked at the story from Luke 8 where Jesus goes to the other side of the lake to rescue a man taken hostage by demons.
Here's the rest of the story: The now-freed man begs Jesus to take him along with the rest of Jesus' disciples. But Jesus tells the man to stay where he is; to go home and tell everyone about how much God has done for him.
When Jesus returned to that area later on, rather than being run out of town as he was in Luke 8, this time around the people were eager to meet him, see him, and listen to him. We can assume, and it is more than an assumption, that the freed man did what Jesus told him to do. He told people about how Jesus had rescued him. And, hearing the story, the people now wanted to see Jesus for themselves.
Deeply simple--tell our friends, our families, our neighbors, our co-workers how much God has done for us. Many of them will want to see, meet, and follow Jesus themselves. It only takes one story-teller to change a city.
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Coaching Boys
I had the chance this morning to be a part of our new Grace Adventure Club. During the sermon I headed out with some of our coaches and our 3rd-6th grade boys to play and then huddle. At the first service we played Bump, a basketball-type game. I won the first round! But I'm glad to concede that Zach was the champion of the world. At the second service we played kick ball. My team kicked-butt and won by 2!
During the huddle we started a journey through the Gospel of Mark. So today we talked a bit about good news and how the word, Gospel, means good news. We looked at how Jesus is good news (Mark 1:1). We went around the huddle and talked about what we are thankful for and prayed after the brief talk.
It's a pretty cool model. If I were that age I'd love it. In fact, at the second service we could barely get the boys in for communion--and it was blazing hot outside. (My son was late for church this morning and happened to be walking to the building when he saw me headed to the court to play. He asked what I was doing and so I grabbed him and made him one of the coaches. It was fun to have my own boy--although a 25 year old boy--out playing with us!)
It's very rewarding to see our men out hanging with the boys. It's also cool to have some of the guys taking the lead in planning the activity and the huddle talk.
We are now in the process of putting together a team of mentors for our 3rd-6th grade girls and hope to have their side of the Grace Adventure Club up and running by July. But I still managed to kick and inside the park homerun!
At that point we'll do a shift of sorts. We will be giving our nursery-2nd grade ministry the name: Grace Kids Club. Our ministry to 3rd-6th grade boys and girls will carry on the name Grace Adventure Club. Cool logos, T-shirts, and hats to come!
A couple of learnings for me personally--it's hot out right now! and I'm a bit old to be running bases in such heat!
During the huddle we started a journey through the Gospel of Mark. So today we talked a bit about good news and how the word, Gospel, means good news. We looked at how Jesus is good news (Mark 1:1). We went around the huddle and talked about what we are thankful for and prayed after the brief talk.
It's a pretty cool model. If I were that age I'd love it. In fact, at the second service we could barely get the boys in for communion--and it was blazing hot outside. (My son was late for church this morning and happened to be walking to the building when he saw me headed to the court to play. He asked what I was doing and so I grabbed him and made him one of the coaches. It was fun to have my own boy--although a 25 year old boy--out playing with us!)
It's very rewarding to see our men out hanging with the boys. It's also cool to have some of the guys taking the lead in planning the activity and the huddle talk.
We are now in the process of putting together a team of mentors for our 3rd-6th grade girls and hope to have their side of the Grace Adventure Club up and running by July. But I still managed to kick and inside the park homerun!
At that point we'll do a shift of sorts. We will be giving our nursery-2nd grade ministry the name: Grace Kids Club. Our ministry to 3rd-6th grade boys and girls will carry on the name Grace Adventure Club. Cool logos, T-shirts, and hats to come!
A couple of learnings for me personally--it's hot out right now! and I'm a bit old to be running bases in such heat!
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Saturday am with the Homeless
This morning I was invited to speak at a downtown Phoenix ministry to the homeless. Every other Saturday or so, Mama Jo organizes local volunteers to come downtown and help feed the homeless. Mama Jo is in her 70's. She's a spitfire. She's passionate about Jesus and passionate about bringing his love to the homeless in tangible ways. Various congregations participate, including volunteers from Grace. They pay for, bring, make, and serve the food while a group sings some worship choruses and one or two people share the Gospel through a message.
I had been there years ago to help serve. It was an honor to be able to preach for a few moments this time around. The preaching takes place as the people are being served their food. Right before I started to talk Mama Jo took the mic and said, "We have a special preacher here today. So you need to be quiet and listen to him. If you don't, I'm going to take your names and spank you after the service!" They love her enough and she loves them enough for her to talk that way.
I promised them that if they'd listen, I'd keep it short. So I told them a modified version of the Les Misearbles story of Jean Valjean. Again, the volunteers are serving the meal as I'm speaking so at first it was pretty noisy. But very quickly it grew very quiet, one of those things a speaker subconsciously notices. It's often a cue that people are listening in, that God is up to something. Usually a message has one or two of those points. But in this case, it happened quickly. Internally I thought to myself, "Wow, they're really into this story." Then it hit me. "Oh, they all just got their meals and are busy eating!"
So much for my brilliant oratory skills!
Afterward a young man introduced himself to me. His name is John. John is from the Sudan. He was granted asylum here 4 days ago. He's staying in a shelter for a few days while he gets his paper work in order. He wanted me to know he is a Christian and was anxious to connect with a local church. Mama Jo set him up with one.
A big "atta-grace" to all of the volunteers and especially to Mama Jo who give of themselves to images of God who have had that image battered, bruised, dirtied, and crumpled, sometimes through their own choices, sometimes through life's circumstances. They give these images of God a taste--literally and figuratively--of how God really sees them.
I had been there years ago to help serve. It was an honor to be able to preach for a few moments this time around. The preaching takes place as the people are being served their food. Right before I started to talk Mama Jo took the mic and said, "We have a special preacher here today. So you need to be quiet and listen to him. If you don't, I'm going to take your names and spank you after the service!" They love her enough and she loves them enough for her to talk that way.
I promised them that if they'd listen, I'd keep it short. So I told them a modified version of the Les Misearbles story of Jean Valjean. Again, the volunteers are serving the meal as I'm speaking so at first it was pretty noisy. But very quickly it grew very quiet, one of those things a speaker subconsciously notices. It's often a cue that people are listening in, that God is up to something. Usually a message has one or two of those points. But in this case, it happened quickly. Internally I thought to myself, "Wow, they're really into this story." Then it hit me. "Oh, they all just got their meals and are busy eating!"
So much for my brilliant oratory skills!
Afterward a young man introduced himself to me. His name is John. John is from the Sudan. He was granted asylum here 4 days ago. He's staying in a shelter for a few days while he gets his paper work in order. He wanted me to know he is a Christian and was anxious to connect with a local church. Mama Jo set him up with one.
A big "atta-grace" to all of the volunteers and especially to Mama Jo who give of themselves to images of God who have had that image battered, bruised, dirtied, and crumpled, sometimes through their own choices, sometimes through life's circumstances. They give these images of God a taste--literally and figuratively--of how God really sees them.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Reflecting on Mother's Day, 2009
To state the obvious, I'm not the primary target of Mother's Day. Nor is our annual Mother's Day service planned with a guy like me in mind. But I must admit that this year's Mother's Day weekend was especially profound.
It actually started on Saturday night when almost 100 of us enjoyed a Mother's Day meal served up by our youth. As they served us the youth sang, danced, played piano, and overall impressed the living daylights out of me. They set up the banquet for two reasons: To honor moms. And to raise money for their missions trip to New Orleans in July.
Sunday was amazing. We went "acoustic" using 4 guitars, a bass, and drums. All men!
And words can't describe the presentation Terey Summers delivered for all the moms and the women in worship on Sunday. It was probably the best thing Terey has ever done, and I've seen Terey do great stuff for over 15 years. It was a "you really missed something if you weren't in church on Sunday" kind of experience. She started out as a 4 year old girl then moved to a teenager then to a new mom then to a great-grandma, and finally ended with Terey's own personal sharing about not having had the chance to be a mom. Again, even though I wasn't the target audience, God used Terey to speak to me about his grace anyway.
I'm honored to be one of the pastors of a congregation that seeks to help people discover or rediscover just how much their creator loves and believes in them.
It was a good weekend.
It actually started on Saturday night when almost 100 of us enjoyed a Mother's Day meal served up by our youth. As they served us the youth sang, danced, played piano, and overall impressed the living daylights out of me. They set up the banquet for two reasons: To honor moms. And to raise money for their missions trip to New Orleans in July.
Sunday was amazing. We went "acoustic" using 4 guitars, a bass, and drums. All men!
And words can't describe the presentation Terey Summers delivered for all the moms and the women in worship on Sunday. It was probably the best thing Terey has ever done, and I've seen Terey do great stuff for over 15 years. It was a "you really missed something if you weren't in church on Sunday" kind of experience. She started out as a 4 year old girl then moved to a teenager then to a new mom then to a great-grandma, and finally ended with Terey's own personal sharing about not having had the chance to be a mom. Again, even though I wasn't the target audience, God used Terey to speak to me about his grace anyway.
I'm honored to be one of the pastors of a congregation that seeks to help people discover or rediscover just how much their creator loves and believes in them.
It was a good weekend.
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Rethinking Sunday School--Part 3
(It goes without saying again but since this is part 3, it would be really helpful to read parts 1 and 2! :))
As I began, along with Mike, one of our Grace Adventure Club (GAC) leaders, to think through what it might mean to move from a program/information model to a mentoring, coaching, discipling model in Sunday School, we also began to think through the difference in the ways that boys and girls learn and grow.
Generally speaking, the typical Sunday School program skews to the strengths of girls. It's usually highly verbal, highly concept oriented, lots of reading, and, more often than not, is lead by a woman. Boys verbal and reading and concept skills tend to develop later than those skills do in girls. Boys learn best via activity and image/visual. Think about it. Most of the coaching Jesus did took place outside, while on walks, using visuals to mentor his 12 men. He did a lot of demonstrating his message by bringing them on healing trips, by modeling prayer, etc.
What we want to do is put the adventure of following Jesus into the Adventure Club by moving from information/program to modeling, coaching, mentoring, forming, etc. We want our kids formed in Jesus, not just informed about him. That requires a very different model for Sunday School.
Richard Rohr, a Catholic Priest and a man devoted to discipling men, writes this: It is strange how we have forgotten how Jesus formed his disciples. We can read all of the words of Jesus in the Gospels in a matter of hours, but Jesus spent three long years discipling the men who followed him. What he gave them was not so much his words but his example and his energy, his time and his touch. "Where do you live?" said the first two disciples of Jesus. "Come and see," he replied, "so they went and saw where he lived, and stayed with him the rest of that day." (John 1:39)...They knew how energy was passed, and it was not primarily by sermons and books, but by relationships and presence." (From Wild Man to Wise Man, pp. 132-133).
Because boys, teenage boys, and young adult men are on Christianity's endangered species list (Christianity is the only major religion losing boys and men!) we decided to start with our boys in this new model. The concept is simple: Get a couple of men (coaches) to hang out with our boys for 15-20 minutes. Do some fun stuff with them (sports, projects, etc) and then huddle up for an object lesson, or a story having to do with Jesus, and then to pray together.
This has at least three promising impacts: 1) It begins to form in our boys the grace to follow Jesus--not just learn about him but to actively engage in following him. 2) It enables our boys to see men who follow Jesus. To let them draw some masculine spirituality from the men. Again, following Jesus is more caught than taught. We have fewer and fewer everyday guy models of followers of Jesus. 3) It gives men a chance to invest themselves in boys in ways that men are gifted. Most men don't teach Sunday School because the gifts required are usually skewed female. But most guys can play ball with boys. They can build something with them. They can create something with them. And, with some coaching, they can do a short object lesson or talk about a Christian sports hero or tell a story about Jesus (and there are many of us men who do have strong verbal skills).
Our strategy at this point is to get this coaching model ramped up for our 3rd-6th grade boys over the next couple of months. Then, we'll do the same for our 3rd-6th grade girls. The younger children, for the time being, will continue in our GAC program as it works for them at that age.
What will it take? To begin, some men to man-up for Jesus and offer to help mentor our boys. To quote the famous anonymous: Small boys become big men through the influence of big men who care about small boys.
In a few months, it will take some women to step up and invest themselves in our girls.
The combination of worshipping with the big people, being mentored/coached during the message, and then participating in communion with the big people, is a combination I believe that can form boys and girls into dynamic followers of Jesus.
And I'm putting this all in writing so that we can hold each other accountable and see, in the end, if this was a God-idea or indigestion.
As I began, along with Mike, one of our Grace Adventure Club (GAC) leaders, to think through what it might mean to move from a program/information model to a mentoring, coaching, discipling model in Sunday School, we also began to think through the difference in the ways that boys and girls learn and grow.
Generally speaking, the typical Sunday School program skews to the strengths of girls. It's usually highly verbal, highly concept oriented, lots of reading, and, more often than not, is lead by a woman. Boys verbal and reading and concept skills tend to develop later than those skills do in girls. Boys learn best via activity and image/visual. Think about it. Most of the coaching Jesus did took place outside, while on walks, using visuals to mentor his 12 men. He did a lot of demonstrating his message by bringing them on healing trips, by modeling prayer, etc.
What we want to do is put the adventure of following Jesus into the Adventure Club by moving from information/program to modeling, coaching, mentoring, forming, etc. We want our kids formed in Jesus, not just informed about him. That requires a very different model for Sunday School.
Richard Rohr, a Catholic Priest and a man devoted to discipling men, writes this: It is strange how we have forgotten how Jesus formed his disciples. We can read all of the words of Jesus in the Gospels in a matter of hours, but Jesus spent three long years discipling the men who followed him. What he gave them was not so much his words but his example and his energy, his time and his touch. "Where do you live?" said the first two disciples of Jesus. "Come and see," he replied, "so they went and saw where he lived, and stayed with him the rest of that day." (John 1:39)...They knew how energy was passed, and it was not primarily by sermons and books, but by relationships and presence." (From Wild Man to Wise Man, pp. 132-133).
Because boys, teenage boys, and young adult men are on Christianity's endangered species list (Christianity is the only major religion losing boys and men!) we decided to start with our boys in this new model. The concept is simple: Get a couple of men (coaches) to hang out with our boys for 15-20 minutes. Do some fun stuff with them (sports, projects, etc) and then huddle up for an object lesson, or a story having to do with Jesus, and then to pray together.
This has at least three promising impacts: 1) It begins to form in our boys the grace to follow Jesus--not just learn about him but to actively engage in following him. 2) It enables our boys to see men who follow Jesus. To let them draw some masculine spirituality from the men. Again, following Jesus is more caught than taught. We have fewer and fewer everyday guy models of followers of Jesus. 3) It gives men a chance to invest themselves in boys in ways that men are gifted. Most men don't teach Sunday School because the gifts required are usually skewed female. But most guys can play ball with boys. They can build something with them. They can create something with them. And, with some coaching, they can do a short object lesson or talk about a Christian sports hero or tell a story about Jesus (and there are many of us men who do have strong verbal skills).
Our strategy at this point is to get this coaching model ramped up for our 3rd-6th grade boys over the next couple of months. Then, we'll do the same for our 3rd-6th grade girls. The younger children, for the time being, will continue in our GAC program as it works for them at that age.
What will it take? To begin, some men to man-up for Jesus and offer to help mentor our boys. To quote the famous anonymous: Small boys become big men through the influence of big men who care about small boys.
In a few months, it will take some women to step up and invest themselves in our girls.
The combination of worshipping with the big people, being mentored/coached during the message, and then participating in communion with the big people, is a combination I believe that can form boys and girls into dynamic followers of Jesus.
And I'm putting this all in writing so that we can hold each other accountable and see, in the end, if this was a God-idea or indigestion.
Rethinking Sunday School--Part 2
(It should go without saying but since this is part 2 it will make more sense if you read part 1!)
Because there were so many other things on my plate, Sunday School at Grace was important, but was also relegated to the a back corner in my mind. In part that was because the vision for it wasn't coming clear. We had the right idea--Grace Adventure Club (joining the adventure of following Jesus) but the program model didn't seem to fit the title so to speak. Though done really well, it was still about program and about transferring information.
Then some things began to click. The first was a few weeks ago when I was passionately trying to recruit people to help out with the Grace Adventure Club (GAC). We've always struggled with getting teachers, particularly men. So during my impassioned appeal I talked of how important relationships are in the lives of kids. It's not really about the space but about the relationship with an adult.
Not long after that David Murrow, author of Why Men Hate Going to Church, was in town and stayed at our house for a couple of days. We had some really intense, spirited, and helpful discussions about reaching men. We talked about how men learn. About how Jesus discipled his 12 men. It was a big kick in the pants for me. Early on in our history he challenged me to be more intentional about reaching this endangered species but I'd gotten distracted. Not only did he give me some great ideas for discipling men, but it triggered a deeper think about how we disciple our kids.
Around that time I met with our GAC leaders and Mike reminded me of how its about relationships, not the room or the program. After that meeting it all fell into place. What had been churning in the back of my brain finally came to the forefront.
Jesus didn't simply impart information. Jesus formed his followers. He did so through activity, through conversation, through hanging out with them, through modeling what a relationship with God looks like. David Murrow actually timed the parables of Jesus. The average story Jesus tells is about 38 seconds long. So in between those short stories Jesus did a lot of mentoring, coaching, discipling. It wasn't about a program. It wasn't even really about learning information. It was about a relationship with Jesus, who gave himself to his 12 men so they could do what Jesus did and give themselves to others.
Because there were so many other things on my plate, Sunday School at Grace was important, but was also relegated to the a back corner in my mind. In part that was because the vision for it wasn't coming clear. We had the right idea--Grace Adventure Club (joining the adventure of following Jesus) but the program model didn't seem to fit the title so to speak. Though done really well, it was still about program and about transferring information.
Then some things began to click. The first was a few weeks ago when I was passionately trying to recruit people to help out with the Grace Adventure Club (GAC). We've always struggled with getting teachers, particularly men. So during my impassioned appeal I talked of how important relationships are in the lives of kids. It's not really about the space but about the relationship with an adult.
Not long after that David Murrow, author of Why Men Hate Going to Church, was in town and stayed at our house for a couple of days. We had some really intense, spirited, and helpful discussions about reaching men. We talked about how men learn. About how Jesus discipled his 12 men. It was a big kick in the pants for me. Early on in our history he challenged me to be more intentional about reaching this endangered species but I'd gotten distracted. Not only did he give me some great ideas for discipling men, but it triggered a deeper think about how we disciple our kids.
Around that time I met with our GAC leaders and Mike reminded me of how its about relationships, not the room or the program. After that meeting it all fell into place. What had been churning in the back of my brain finally came to the forefront.
Jesus didn't simply impart information. Jesus formed his followers. He did so through activity, through conversation, through hanging out with them, through modeling what a relationship with God looks like. David Murrow actually timed the parables of Jesus. The average story Jesus tells is about 38 seconds long. So in between those short stories Jesus did a lot of mentoring, coaching, discipling. It wasn't about a program. It wasn't even really about learning information. It was about a relationship with Jesus, who gave himself to his 12 men so they could do what Jesus did and give themselves to others.
Rethinking Sunday School--Part 1
One of the great things about starting a new church is that you can start a new church! You can do things a new way. You also have the chance, before things become too ingrained, to experiment, reflect, and experiment some more.
One of the challenging things about starting a new church is that there are so many areas where you have the chance to do something new and you can't get to them all at once. On top of that, you bring into the new certain ways of doing things from the past that may or may not be helpful and when you're over-stressed, it's easy to revert back to prior conditioning.
In starting Grace we have been trying to move from a program-driven model to a missional community model--one built around groups and groups doing mission. Over all, I'm pleased with where we are in this process and look forward to taking things to the next level as we begin to implement some intentional discipleship groups.
Sunday School, however, has been an interesting challenge. On the one hand, most parents want a great program for their kids. After all, this is what most of us who were raised in the church experienced--a one hour program. And this is what many of the great churches in the area are doing--huge, dynamic, highly energized programs from first class worship bands to video games to Sesame Street type productions. And these churches are doing them well! And let's face it, if the kids want to go to Sunday school on Sunday, then parents will attend any church that creates that kind of excitement for their kids.
So, on the one hand, in starting a new church you want to provide a good, quality Sunday School program to reach kids and their parents.
On the other hand, there's the problem of statistics. Statistics tell us again and again that children who attend Sunday School, no matter how great the program, but who never attend worship with adults, will more likely not attend worship as adults. Children who never attend Sunday School but do worship with their parents will more likely attend worship as adults.
In our setting we had the additional challenge of inadequate space. We have a closet for nursery and two locker rooms for Sunday School. While I'm convinced that in the end its relationships, not space, that transform the lives of our kids (I'll come back to that later), young parents aren't all that crazy about putting their precious little ones in a closet or locker room!
So, we made the decision from the beginning that our kids would worship with their parents. We want the kids to see themselves as a part of the larger family of faith and to get used to worshipping in "big people" church. We also decided that we would dismiss the kids during the message for an experience more geared to them.
That, of course, creates its own problems. Some parents want don't want their kids in worship and they have left to join churches that offer Sunday School during worship. I get that. The other challenge is that you get about 15-20 minutes with the kids vs. 60 minutes. What can you accomplish in that time? What do you do with that time? (Of course, what do you do for 60 minutes to hold the attention of kids!)
We've tried a few different really good ideas. To reflect those good ideas we changed the name from Sunday School to the Grace Adventure Club. The last thing kids want to do is go to school on Sunday! We wanted to focus on the adventure of following Jesus and tried to do so through stories, art, activities, and so on.
And while what we were doing was good, in a small corner of my brain I sensed something wasn't quite right. It had nothing to do with the quality of our Grace Adventure Club, the teachers or the program. Just a sense that we weren't really doing what we wanted to do. Part of the problem was not being sure of what we wanted to do.
It took 4 years, but over the last few weeks some things have happened that have started to tease out the dis-ease in my brain. Much of it had to do with continuing to do a program/informational model vs a truly discipling/formation model.
One of the challenging things about starting a new church is that there are so many areas where you have the chance to do something new and you can't get to them all at once. On top of that, you bring into the new certain ways of doing things from the past that may or may not be helpful and when you're over-stressed, it's easy to revert back to prior conditioning.
In starting Grace we have been trying to move from a program-driven model to a missional community model--one built around groups and groups doing mission. Over all, I'm pleased with where we are in this process and look forward to taking things to the next level as we begin to implement some intentional discipleship groups.
Sunday School, however, has been an interesting challenge. On the one hand, most parents want a great program for their kids. After all, this is what most of us who were raised in the church experienced--a one hour program. And this is what many of the great churches in the area are doing--huge, dynamic, highly energized programs from first class worship bands to video games to Sesame Street type productions. And these churches are doing them well! And let's face it, if the kids want to go to Sunday school on Sunday, then parents will attend any church that creates that kind of excitement for their kids.
So, on the one hand, in starting a new church you want to provide a good, quality Sunday School program to reach kids and their parents.
On the other hand, there's the problem of statistics. Statistics tell us again and again that children who attend Sunday School, no matter how great the program, but who never attend worship with adults, will more likely not attend worship as adults. Children who never attend Sunday School but do worship with their parents will more likely attend worship as adults.
In our setting we had the additional challenge of inadequate space. We have a closet for nursery and two locker rooms for Sunday School. While I'm convinced that in the end its relationships, not space, that transform the lives of our kids (I'll come back to that later), young parents aren't all that crazy about putting their precious little ones in a closet or locker room!
So, we made the decision from the beginning that our kids would worship with their parents. We want the kids to see themselves as a part of the larger family of faith and to get used to worshipping in "big people" church. We also decided that we would dismiss the kids during the message for an experience more geared to them.
That, of course, creates its own problems. Some parents want don't want their kids in worship and they have left to join churches that offer Sunday School during worship. I get that. The other challenge is that you get about 15-20 minutes with the kids vs. 60 minutes. What can you accomplish in that time? What do you do with that time? (Of course, what do you do for 60 minutes to hold the attention of kids!)
We've tried a few different really good ideas. To reflect those good ideas we changed the name from Sunday School to the Grace Adventure Club. The last thing kids want to do is go to school on Sunday! We wanted to focus on the adventure of following Jesus and tried to do so through stories, art, activities, and so on.
And while what we were doing was good, in a small corner of my brain I sensed something wasn't quite right. It had nothing to do with the quality of our Grace Adventure Club, the teachers or the program. Just a sense that we weren't really doing what we wanted to do. Part of the problem was not being sure of what we wanted to do.
It took 4 years, but over the last few weeks some things have happened that have started to tease out the dis-ease in my brain. Much of it had to do with continuing to do a program/informational model vs a truly discipling/formation model.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Hanging in Israel--6
Our last full day in Israel:
Highlights from today: Visiting the Antonio Fortress where Jesus faced Pilate and was beaten by the soldiers.
Golgatha and the Garden Tomb/communion experience.
We also visited the new Holocaust Museum. A tough subject but the Museum was really well done.
It has been an indescribable trip (hence the short posts--it's all hard to describe!).
Israel gets in your heart and soul. It really does become a second home.
Having said that, we're looking forward to getting back to our first home.
Highlights from today: Visiting the Antonio Fortress where Jesus faced Pilate and was beaten by the soldiers.
Golgatha and the Garden Tomb/communion experience.
We also visited the new Holocaust Museum. A tough subject but the Museum was really well done.
It has been an indescribable trip (hence the short posts--it's all hard to describe!).
Israel gets in your heart and soul. It really does become a second home.
Having said that, we're looking forward to getting back to our first home.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Hanging in Israel--5
Thursday, March 12--
Walking through the excavations of King David's city down to the pools of Siloam.
Standing on the original steps to the southern entrance to the temple--steps Jesus would have walked on.
Sleep!
Walking through the excavations of King David's city down to the pools of Siloam.
Standing on the original steps to the southern entrance to the temple--steps Jesus would have walked on.
Sleep!
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Hanging in Israel--4
More Highlights from Israel:
Finishing up Monday, March 9--floating on the Dead Sea
Tuesday, March 10--Masada (I climbed the snake path up the mountain to the Fortress built there by King Herod!). Riding into Jerusalem
Wednesday, March 11--The Herodion (another palace built by Herod, this time inside a mountain top). Visiting with Pastor Mitri at Christmas Lutheran Church in Bethlehem. Reading the Christmas Story in Bethlehem.
Really, really, really excellent bread and hummus.
Finishing up Monday, March 9--floating on the Dead Sea
Tuesday, March 10--Masada (I climbed the snake path up the mountain to the Fortress built there by King Herod!). Riding into Jerusalem
Wednesday, March 11--The Herodion (another palace built by Herod, this time inside a mountain top). Visiting with Pastor Mitri at Christmas Lutheran Church in Bethlehem. Reading the Christmas Story in Bethlehem.
Really, really, really excellent bread and hummus.
Monday, March 9, 2009
Hanging in Israel--3
It's Monday afternoon. We're at the Dead Sea. I'm contemplating whether or not to take a "float" on the Sea for awhile.
Since the pictures won't upload and since I don't want to do a travelogue, I thought I would try to give my 3-5 highlights from each day.
Obviously, I'm a bit behind so here goes: (I'll start with today and work backwards):
Monday, March 9--An "easy day." We stopped at Bet She'an, an old Roman town that is being "rebuilt" via excavation. I love this place. It's also the sight where King Saul's and his son Jonathan's bodies were hung after they died in battle.
Sunday, March 8: Nimrod's Fortress (a Crusader Fortress on top of a hill--very cool!); Caesarea Philippi, the place where Jesus asks his disciples, "Who do you say that I am?" It's the headwaters of the Jordan River and we had a great walk along it to some awesome waterfalls. Tel Dan (a tel is a hill created by building one city on top of another over generations).
Thursday, March 5-Saturday, March 7--The Sea of Galilee area. This is my favorite spot in Israel. Capernaum, the headquarters of Jesus' ministry, Zippori (a hugh excavated town near Nazareth where Jesus and his dad probably worked as tradesmen), the place of the Beatitudes, the Sea itself. Watching the sun set on the Galilee was a highlight.
The food has been fantastic.
Obviously lots more but those are a few highlights so far.
Since the pictures won't upload and since I don't want to do a travelogue, I thought I would try to give my 3-5 highlights from each day.
Obviously, I'm a bit behind so here goes: (I'll start with today and work backwards):
Monday, March 9--An "easy day." We stopped at Bet She'an, an old Roman town that is being "rebuilt" via excavation. I love this place. It's also the sight where King Saul's and his son Jonathan's bodies were hung after they died in battle.
Sunday, March 8: Nimrod's Fortress (a Crusader Fortress on top of a hill--very cool!); Caesarea Philippi, the place where Jesus asks his disciples, "Who do you say that I am?" It's the headwaters of the Jordan River and we had a great walk along it to some awesome waterfalls. Tel Dan (a tel is a hill created by building one city on top of another over generations).
Thursday, March 5-Saturday, March 7--The Sea of Galilee area. This is my favorite spot in Israel. Capernaum, the headquarters of Jesus' ministry, Zippori (a hugh excavated town near Nazareth where Jesus and his dad probably worked as tradesmen), the place of the Beatitudes, the Sea itself. Watching the sun set on the Galilee was a highlight.
The food has been fantastic.
Obviously lots more but those are a few highlights so far.
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Hanging in Israel--2
We've been having a fantastic experience in Israel. But I've found it difficult to blog about it for 2 reasons. The days are long so I've not had much chance to sit down and write. And...I don't want to simply give a travelogue. I tried to upload some pictures but the internet is so very slow that the pics aren't uploading.
So...we've seen some really cool stuff.
Having a great time. Wish you were here!
So...we've seen some really cool stuff.
Having a great time. Wish you were here!
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Hanging in Israel--1
A group of about 18 of us, most of us from Grace, left Phoenix on Monday evening for a journey to Israel. After a 10 hour flight to London we headed into the city on a very cold, blustery, raining afternoon for what turned out to be a quick, cold walk.
After another 5 hours to Israel, we landed in Tel Aiv at 5 am. That meant a long day to stay up!
Our hotel was on the Mediterranean Ocean so quite lovely. About 3 miles down the coast is the ancient city of Jaffa (or Joppa in some Bibles). It was from Jaffa that Jonah boarded a ship to run away from God. It was in Jaffa that Peter, staying at Simon the Tanner's house, healed Tabitha. The Roman Centurion Cornelius sent some men down from Caesarea to Jaffa (at the request of an angel). While they were on the way Peter, in Jaffa, had a dream about unclean animals. God used that dream to remind Peter that the Gentiles are not unclean. Peter went from Jaffa to Caesarea to visit with Cornelius who ended up becoming a Christian.
The next day we headed up to Caesarea ourselves. It's a fascinating ruin on the Sea built by Herod the great. The Theatre still stands, as does the Hippodrome. You can see some of the amazing outlines of his palace. Paul would have been held here before being sent off to Rome. Pilate spent much of his time here while governing Jerusalem.
We also visited Mt. Carmel where Elijah took on the prophets of bail in a contest to see who was God. God won hands down. Then, finally, off to Megiddo, a tel (a hill made up of one city being built up on top of another.) We can see the gates from the time of Solomon. Other buildings from the time of King Ahab. Plus a very, very cool underground water system.
For the next several days we're staying on a Kibutz, run by very orthodox Jews. A beautiful place right on the Sea of Galilee.
After another 5 hours to Israel, we landed in Tel Aiv at 5 am. That meant a long day to stay up!
Our hotel was on the Mediterranean Ocean so quite lovely. About 3 miles down the coast is the ancient city of Jaffa (or Joppa in some Bibles). It was from Jaffa that Jonah boarded a ship to run away from God. It was in Jaffa that Peter, staying at Simon the Tanner's house, healed Tabitha. The Roman Centurion Cornelius sent some men down from Caesarea to Jaffa (at the request of an angel). While they were on the way Peter, in Jaffa, had a dream about unclean animals. God used that dream to remind Peter that the Gentiles are not unclean. Peter went from Jaffa to Caesarea to visit with Cornelius who ended up becoming a Christian.
The next day we headed up to Caesarea ourselves. It's a fascinating ruin on the Sea built by Herod the great. The Theatre still stands, as does the Hippodrome. You can see some of the amazing outlines of his palace. Paul would have been held here before being sent off to Rome. Pilate spent much of his time here while governing Jerusalem.
We also visited Mt. Carmel where Elijah took on the prophets of bail in a contest to see who was God. God won hands down. Then, finally, off to Megiddo, a tel (a hill made up of one city being built up on top of another.) We can see the gates from the time of Solomon. Other buildings from the time of King Ahab. Plus a very, very cool underground water system.
For the next several days we're staying on a Kibutz, run by very orthodox Jews. A beautiful place right on the Sea of Galilee.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Musings on 25 Years of Ordained Ministry--17: Final Thoughts
Today is the actual 25th Anniversary of my ordination (at least where I am). I'm sitting in Tel Aviv, Israel as I write this.
On Sunday Community of Grace threw me a nice party to celebrate the big event. It was great fun.
As I wrap up--a few thoughts on what's most important on a day like this:
Grandparents who nurtured me in the faith
Parents who prayed for me every day and encouraged my hopes and dreams
Teachers and youth leaders and pastors who shared Jesus with me
Professors and Bible teachers who challenged my faith
Congregations that provided the resources so that someone like me could hear about Jesus
The many, many great people I've worked with over the years from Walt and the staff of Joy to my current partners in mission--the staff and congregation of Grace
I interviewed former Cards quarterback Neil Lomax on Sunday. He said what's more important than being a great ball player is being a great dad.
I love being a dad. I am so very, very proud of my kids. Alycia's passion for the abused, oppressed and voiceless has had a profound impact on me and on Community of Grace. Mike's love of music and sports brings such joy to me, and his music such grace to the church. Alycia's hubby Corey and Mike's wife Amber are true answers to our prayers.
I love being married to Jan. She has been and is the best life partner I could have. From loving Jesus to her passion for ministry to her support of my calling to those long days putting up with my anxiety, to being a fantastic mom, I love her with my whole heart.
Finally, it's always about and has always been about Jesus, that he would love and use someone such as me. All praise, honor, and worship goes to him. He's called me. And that alone brings enough humility, joy, and head-scratching to last a lifetime.
On Sunday Community of Grace threw me a nice party to celebrate the big event. It was great fun.
As I wrap up--a few thoughts on what's most important on a day like this:
Grandparents who nurtured me in the faith
Parents who prayed for me every day and encouraged my hopes and dreams
Teachers and youth leaders and pastors who shared Jesus with me
Professors and Bible teachers who challenged my faith
Congregations that provided the resources so that someone like me could hear about Jesus
The many, many great people I've worked with over the years from Walt and the staff of Joy to my current partners in mission--the staff and congregation of Grace
I interviewed former Cards quarterback Neil Lomax on Sunday. He said what's more important than being a great ball player is being a great dad.
I love being a dad. I am so very, very proud of my kids. Alycia's passion for the abused, oppressed and voiceless has had a profound impact on me and on Community of Grace. Mike's love of music and sports brings such joy to me, and his music such grace to the church. Alycia's hubby Corey and Mike's wife Amber are true answers to our prayers.
I love being married to Jan. She has been and is the best life partner I could have. From loving Jesus to her passion for ministry to her support of my calling to those long days putting up with my anxiety, to being a fantastic mom, I love her with my whole heart.
Finally, it's always about and has always been about Jesus, that he would love and use someone such as me. All praise, honor, and worship goes to him. He's called me. And that alone brings enough humility, joy, and head-scratching to last a lifetime.
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Musings on 25 Years of Ordained Ministry--16
Personal Stuff
(Today the family of Grace is celebrating my 25th Anniversary. We're off to a great start as former Cardinals Quarterback Neil Lomax was our guest interview today! He was fantastic.)
Though my family may argue otherwise from time to time, life consists of more than ministry. Life happens, too. In no particular order here are some of the memories from the last 25 years that were lived--good and bad--in and around ministry:
Lots of great family trips. Probably our most visited spot on earth is Disneyland. We fell in love with it while on internship and have been fans ever since. For a time, Jan worked at one of the local Disney Stores giving us free passes and special rates on Disneyland hotel rooms. Trips overseas (although Mike hated most of them), trips to Hawaii (surprising our kids the first time by picking them up from school and showing them the airline tickets!), to Aspen, New York City, a couple of "See America Tours" (the history of the East Coast and a wandering trip from Minneapolis to Arizona), vacations in Minneapolis with my family and Jan's family, to Walt Disney World, the Kennedy Space Center, to name a few. Pastor families make certain sacrifices (we've spent the last 25 Christmas Eve's in church, for example) so family trips were and continue to be important.
My grandparents died in the late 80's. Grandma went first and grandpa followed a few weeks later. I was so glad they made it to Phoenix. It was the only time grandma ever flew!
Jan's mom passed away from cancer at the age of 62. Her husband, Vic, had Parkinson's disease so Jan's folks built us a new home before Phadoris died so that we could take in Vic. Turns out Vic didn't like being dependent on us so he moved out and lived for several years before he passed away.
My mom died in 2007 while Jan, Jeff, Diane, and I were in Hawaii. We couldn't get home for 3 days. But family and the family of Grace rallied around my dad. We had an amazing funeral service for her at Zuni. I was awed at the number of people who told me of how encouraging mom had been to them. She had quite a ministry!
Battling against an anxiety disorder that came to full fruition while I was in Pasadena on what was to be a two week Church Growth course. I've had some great successes and some great setbacks but am grateful to still be able to live my life fully. Some are so overwhelmed by it that it shuts them down.
Mike fell in love with Amber while the two of them were musicians over at Radiant Church in Surprise, Arizona. Mike was really whipped. But Amber was in another relationship. Just before Jan and I headed out on a vacation Mike called to say that any possibilities with Amber were over. He was heartbroken. A few days later he called saying he was out to dinner with Amber and her parents! He proposed to her in Hawaii. They were married in 2007. A pretty cool deal for me to marry off my son. They walked out of the ceremony to "Son of a Preacher Man!"
Alycia is our world traveler, moving from one experience to the next, from one degree to the next. She never really had time for a serious relationship. But love finally caught up with her a couple of years ago. In February of 2008 Corey called me while I was on vacation (I get 4 weeks per year but big stuff always happens on them!) to ask if he could marry her. Alycia and I headed to Rwanda in March. What she didn't know was that we arranged for Corey to fly to Phoenix to meet her at the airport when we got home, to propose to her. They were married in August. Again, a great honor to marry off my daughter.
Every day with Jan is a highlight!
Getting Santi the Beagle and Saba the Dachshund has been one of the great joys of our lives. I often say I almost love my kids as much as my dogs.
I trained for and completed 3 marathons (the Walt Disney World, San Diego, and London) and 5 half-marathons. I now enjoy biking, and so does my back and hip.
Taking in a taping of David Letterman, twice. Same with Jay Leno. I'm a huge Letterman fan. Not so much Leno but I loved being a part of the tapings. Sitting in the front row, center seats at a Barry Manilow concert and having him shake my hand at the end of the show. Hearing former President Reagan speak in person. What a speaker! Being at a George W. Bush rally (politics aside, simply very cool to see a president live and in person.)
Driving to the Rose Bowl in 1987 with Walt to watch the Arizona Sun Devils win over Michigan. Jeff Van Raphorst was the quarterback. One year we did a fundraiser event with some college and former pro-athletes. Jeff was one of them. We competed against them. During touch football Jeff came charging at me. I had no idea of how fast those guys move! However, in the sit up competition, I blew him away. A few years later we set up a Sunday interview with him. He had the wrong date and didn't show up. So I interviewed my brother Jeff instead and we "pretended" he was Van Raphorst.
The 1987 World Series. Being from Minneapolis, having the Twins in the series was a big deal. During the playoffs, during our Sunday night services, we would pull out homer tissues and sing the Twins theme song. The decisive game 7 was on a Sunday night. We couldn't cancel church so we did the service and then rushed home to see the Twins win it on the last play of the game.
The 1991 World Series. Once again the Twins were in it. We were in Hawaii--I know, I'm always in Hawaii--on our very first trip there speaking at a conference. Game 7, once again was on Sunday. I had a speaking thing that night. I sat in the car glued to the radio as long as I could but the game went into extra innings. So I told Mike to stay in the car to catch the end of the game. He was 8 years old! I was inside speaking, talking about something fairly serious when Mike ran into the back with his arms in the air! I yelled, "Did they win?" I immediately fell to the floor and said, "There is a God." Not my greatest speaking moment but a moment none-the-less. We moved into a song. I sat next to Mike and asked, "Are you sure they won?" "I think so!" I sent him out to make sure. The Twins won by 1 run.
August 25, 1997 (our wedding anniversary). The Arena League Arizona Rattlers were hosting their first home Arenabowl (they'd already won one!) against Kurt Warner and the Iowa Barnstormers. We stood almost the entire game. I was worn out at the end. But we whipped them! It was pretty cool being at home and winning a big game.
The 2001 World Series in which the Arizona Diamondbacks defeated the Yankees by one run on the final play of the game. All three of the World Series I cared about ended that way! Great for baseball. Hard on the heart.
The NFC Championship game in Phoenix this year when the Cards made a game winning drive in the final minutes of the game against the Eagles to propel them into their first Super Bowl. Another game that left me blissfully exhausted. Having the chance to go to that Super Bowl with my kids was one of the great experiences of our lives.
(Today the family of Grace is celebrating my 25th Anniversary. We're off to a great start as former Cardinals Quarterback Neil Lomax was our guest interview today! He was fantastic.)
Though my family may argue otherwise from time to time, life consists of more than ministry. Life happens, too. In no particular order here are some of the memories from the last 25 years that were lived--good and bad--in and around ministry:
Lots of great family trips. Probably our most visited spot on earth is Disneyland. We fell in love with it while on internship and have been fans ever since. For a time, Jan worked at one of the local Disney Stores giving us free passes and special rates on Disneyland hotel rooms. Trips overseas (although Mike hated most of them), trips to Hawaii (surprising our kids the first time by picking them up from school and showing them the airline tickets!), to Aspen, New York City, a couple of "See America Tours" (the history of the East Coast and a wandering trip from Minneapolis to Arizona), vacations in Minneapolis with my family and Jan's family, to Walt Disney World, the Kennedy Space Center, to name a few. Pastor families make certain sacrifices (we've spent the last 25 Christmas Eve's in church, for example) so family trips were and continue to be important.
My grandparents died in the late 80's. Grandma went first and grandpa followed a few weeks later. I was so glad they made it to Phoenix. It was the only time grandma ever flew!
Jan's mom passed away from cancer at the age of 62. Her husband, Vic, had Parkinson's disease so Jan's folks built us a new home before Phadoris died so that we could take in Vic. Turns out Vic didn't like being dependent on us so he moved out and lived for several years before he passed away.
My mom died in 2007 while Jan, Jeff, Diane, and I were in Hawaii. We couldn't get home for 3 days. But family and the family of Grace rallied around my dad. We had an amazing funeral service for her at Zuni. I was awed at the number of people who told me of how encouraging mom had been to them. She had quite a ministry!
Battling against an anxiety disorder that came to full fruition while I was in Pasadena on what was to be a two week Church Growth course. I've had some great successes and some great setbacks but am grateful to still be able to live my life fully. Some are so overwhelmed by it that it shuts them down.
Mike fell in love with Amber while the two of them were musicians over at Radiant Church in Surprise, Arizona. Mike was really whipped. But Amber was in another relationship. Just before Jan and I headed out on a vacation Mike called to say that any possibilities with Amber were over. He was heartbroken. A few days later he called saying he was out to dinner with Amber and her parents! He proposed to her in Hawaii. They were married in 2007. A pretty cool deal for me to marry off my son. They walked out of the ceremony to "Son of a Preacher Man!"
Alycia is our world traveler, moving from one experience to the next, from one degree to the next. She never really had time for a serious relationship. But love finally caught up with her a couple of years ago. In February of 2008 Corey called me while I was on vacation (I get 4 weeks per year but big stuff always happens on them!) to ask if he could marry her. Alycia and I headed to Rwanda in March. What she didn't know was that we arranged for Corey to fly to Phoenix to meet her at the airport when we got home, to propose to her. They were married in August. Again, a great honor to marry off my daughter.
Every day with Jan is a highlight!
Getting Santi the Beagle and Saba the Dachshund has been one of the great joys of our lives. I often say I almost love my kids as much as my dogs.
I trained for and completed 3 marathons (the Walt Disney World, San Diego, and London) and 5 half-marathons. I now enjoy biking, and so does my back and hip.
Taking in a taping of David Letterman, twice. Same with Jay Leno. I'm a huge Letterman fan. Not so much Leno but I loved being a part of the tapings. Sitting in the front row, center seats at a Barry Manilow concert and having him shake my hand at the end of the show. Hearing former President Reagan speak in person. What a speaker! Being at a George W. Bush rally (politics aside, simply very cool to see a president live and in person.)
Driving to the Rose Bowl in 1987 with Walt to watch the Arizona Sun Devils win over Michigan. Jeff Van Raphorst was the quarterback. One year we did a fundraiser event with some college and former pro-athletes. Jeff was one of them. We competed against them. During touch football Jeff came charging at me. I had no idea of how fast those guys move! However, in the sit up competition, I blew him away. A few years later we set up a Sunday interview with him. He had the wrong date and didn't show up. So I interviewed my brother Jeff instead and we "pretended" he was Van Raphorst.
The 1987 World Series. Being from Minneapolis, having the Twins in the series was a big deal. During the playoffs, during our Sunday night services, we would pull out homer tissues and sing the Twins theme song. The decisive game 7 was on a Sunday night. We couldn't cancel church so we did the service and then rushed home to see the Twins win it on the last play of the game.
The 1991 World Series. Once again the Twins were in it. We were in Hawaii--I know, I'm always in Hawaii--on our very first trip there speaking at a conference. Game 7, once again was on Sunday. I had a speaking thing that night. I sat in the car glued to the radio as long as I could but the game went into extra innings. So I told Mike to stay in the car to catch the end of the game. He was 8 years old! I was inside speaking, talking about something fairly serious when Mike ran into the back with his arms in the air! I yelled, "Did they win?" I immediately fell to the floor and said, "There is a God." Not my greatest speaking moment but a moment none-the-less. We moved into a song. I sat next to Mike and asked, "Are you sure they won?" "I think so!" I sent him out to make sure. The Twins won by 1 run.
August 25, 1997 (our wedding anniversary). The Arena League Arizona Rattlers were hosting their first home Arenabowl (they'd already won one!) against Kurt Warner and the Iowa Barnstormers. We stood almost the entire game. I was worn out at the end. But we whipped them! It was pretty cool being at home and winning a big game.
The 2001 World Series in which the Arizona Diamondbacks defeated the Yankees by one run on the final play of the game. All three of the World Series I cared about ended that way! Great for baseball. Hard on the heart.
The NFC Championship game in Phoenix this year when the Cards made a game winning drive in the final minutes of the game against the Eagles to propel them into their first Super Bowl. Another game that left me blissfully exhausted. Having the chance to go to that Super Bowl with my kids was one of the great experiences of our lives.
Musings on 25 Years of Ordained Ministry--15
Being Grace
We launched Grace on Easter Sunday, March 27, 2005. What a great day. We did one service and had about 600 people show up! It was a bit overwhelming. I knew a good many people were coming to be a part of the first service as a support to us but none-the-less, it was a big day. On top of that we had 19 baptisms.
The next weekend we were at about 360 people and held there or near it after that to our current average of about 500-550 per weekend. We'd been up to over 700 about a year in, but as often happens, many head back to other places or go to new places as the pioneer spirit wears off. Mike Perkinson says that new church starts will lost about 30% of the original group in the first 4-5 years. That doesn't necessarily mean the congregation shrinks by that size as new people hopefully come in, but of the originals, 30% will move on. I'm not sure we're that high but it sounds about right.
At the advice of Mike Breen, we started Grace by using the topics from Alpha as the basis for the sermons. Then, anyone interested could stay after and be a part of a cluster for a brief discussion. After that experiment, clusters began to move into homes during the week.
At first, I didn't lead any clusters but instead coached cluster leaders. But it quickly became apparent that I needed to lead a few so I could better lead the leaders. So I took on a few clusters, some of which I still lead. It enabled me to experiment a bit with various ideas while we were in the early stages of forming clusters.
After our launch we moved from one major event to another--emulating the fast work we put in getting ready to launch Grace.
Some highlights:
June 5, 2005: We held our organizing meeting to become an official congregation of the ELCA. I think we set a record for moving from mission status to official congregation.
July 21, 2005: I was officially installed as the Pastor of Grace.
July 16, 2006: Brian Beckstrom was installed as our Associate Pastor
December 17, 2006: Bishop Steve Talmage hands over the title to the 9.5 acres of land to Grace
January 28, 2007: We officially launched our capital campaign: Building a Community of Grace. We received $1.5 million in 3 year commitments.
We've spent the last several years dreaming about our new campus and designing, re-designing and tweaking the concept and plans. We're ready to build. We're currently praying through the timing in light of the current recession.
Other highlights: Christmas Eve services are always my favorite and the first 4 years have been awesome. Same with Easter services.
We've had in some interesting speakers and interviews over the years from Hope 4 Kids International's Tom Eggum to Walt to Jay Bakker to Rob Morris of love146 (a ministry that works with victims of sex-trafficking) to Pastor John from Rwanda to Pastor Wilbur from Uganda.
Last Thanksgiving time we did a "poverty meal" experience, where we fed everyone a small cup of brown rice and a cup of water (a typical meal for billions around the world) while a family was waited upon on the stage, being fed a gourmet breakfast.
We've done special events from comedy nights to magic nights.
Every Sunday after Christmas we have a pancake breakfast in the worship center.
We've done two Kingdom Assignments. On Palm Sunday, 2008 we brought our unused stuff to Grace to donate to the Lutheran Thrift store and filled up the truck 2 1/2 times. In the fall of 2008 I handed out almost $1100 to various people (in 50's, 20's and 5's) and invited the chosen to try to increase the money and then give it away. Currently we're in Assignment #3--where we are selling something of emotional/monetary value and then, on Sunday, April 19 we'll bring it to worship to give to the Prodigal's Home (a mission to the homeless). I sold my trumpet and received $1250!
Each December our congregation, along with others, participates in Angel Tree, buying and distributing gifts to children whose mom or dad is in prison.
Most rewarding, however, are the relationships built in worship and clusters and the mission being done on a local and international level.
It takes vibrant leaders to build a vibrant congregation and I've had the honor to work with some great people from a talented staff to a committed board to excited everyday followers of Jesus.
One of the delightful surprises of starting Grace has been the chance to reconnect with some of the Lutheran pastors in our area. Because of the size and magnitude of Joy we didn't have the time to attend many "Lutheran" functions. On top of that, through our Leadership Center, we had become a teaching church so we poured a lot of time into congregations and leaders all over the world. The pace of life hasn't necessarily slowed but it is different. And now I have the chance to be a part of a weekly Bible study with some of the pastors and also attend some of the other events.
As we move toward year five we will continue to find ways to be a missional community together, we will continue to worship, meet, serve, and pray. And, somewhere down the line, we'll probably build a new mission facility out of which the mission of the Kingdom, in one of its local expressions called Grace, will continue.
We launched Grace on Easter Sunday, March 27, 2005. What a great day. We did one service and had about 600 people show up! It was a bit overwhelming. I knew a good many people were coming to be a part of the first service as a support to us but none-the-less, it was a big day. On top of that we had 19 baptisms.
The next weekend we were at about 360 people and held there or near it after that to our current average of about 500-550 per weekend. We'd been up to over 700 about a year in, but as often happens, many head back to other places or go to new places as the pioneer spirit wears off. Mike Perkinson says that new church starts will lost about 30% of the original group in the first 4-5 years. That doesn't necessarily mean the congregation shrinks by that size as new people hopefully come in, but of the originals, 30% will move on. I'm not sure we're that high but it sounds about right.
At the advice of Mike Breen, we started Grace by using the topics from Alpha as the basis for the sermons. Then, anyone interested could stay after and be a part of a cluster for a brief discussion. After that experiment, clusters began to move into homes during the week.
At first, I didn't lead any clusters but instead coached cluster leaders. But it quickly became apparent that I needed to lead a few so I could better lead the leaders. So I took on a few clusters, some of which I still lead. It enabled me to experiment a bit with various ideas while we were in the early stages of forming clusters.
After our launch we moved from one major event to another--emulating the fast work we put in getting ready to launch Grace.
Some highlights:
June 5, 2005: We held our organizing meeting to become an official congregation of the ELCA. I think we set a record for moving from mission status to official congregation.
July 21, 2005: I was officially installed as the Pastor of Grace.
July 16, 2006: Brian Beckstrom was installed as our Associate Pastor
December 17, 2006: Bishop Steve Talmage hands over the title to the 9.5 acres of land to Grace
January 28, 2007: We officially launched our capital campaign: Building a Community of Grace. We received $1.5 million in 3 year commitments.
We've spent the last several years dreaming about our new campus and designing, re-designing and tweaking the concept and plans. We're ready to build. We're currently praying through the timing in light of the current recession.
Other highlights: Christmas Eve services are always my favorite and the first 4 years have been awesome. Same with Easter services.
We've had in some interesting speakers and interviews over the years from Hope 4 Kids International's Tom Eggum to Walt to Jay Bakker to Rob Morris of love146 (a ministry that works with victims of sex-trafficking) to Pastor John from Rwanda to Pastor Wilbur from Uganda.
Last Thanksgiving time we did a "poverty meal" experience, where we fed everyone a small cup of brown rice and a cup of water (a typical meal for billions around the world) while a family was waited upon on the stage, being fed a gourmet breakfast.
We've done special events from comedy nights to magic nights.
Every Sunday after Christmas we have a pancake breakfast in the worship center.
We've done two Kingdom Assignments. On Palm Sunday, 2008 we brought our unused stuff to Grace to donate to the Lutheran Thrift store and filled up the truck 2 1/2 times. In the fall of 2008 I handed out almost $1100 to various people (in 50's, 20's and 5's) and invited the chosen to try to increase the money and then give it away. Currently we're in Assignment #3--where we are selling something of emotional/monetary value and then, on Sunday, April 19 we'll bring it to worship to give to the Prodigal's Home (a mission to the homeless). I sold my trumpet and received $1250!
Each December our congregation, along with others, participates in Angel Tree, buying and distributing gifts to children whose mom or dad is in prison.
Most rewarding, however, are the relationships built in worship and clusters and the mission being done on a local and international level.
It takes vibrant leaders to build a vibrant congregation and I've had the honor to work with some great people from a talented staff to a committed board to excited everyday followers of Jesus.
One of the delightful surprises of starting Grace has been the chance to reconnect with some of the Lutheran pastors in our area. Because of the size and magnitude of Joy we didn't have the time to attend many "Lutheran" functions. On top of that, through our Leadership Center, we had become a teaching church so we poured a lot of time into congregations and leaders all over the world. The pace of life hasn't necessarily slowed but it is different. And now I have the chance to be a part of a weekly Bible study with some of the pastors and also attend some of the other events.
As we move toward year five we will continue to find ways to be a missional community together, we will continue to worship, meet, serve, and pray. And, somewhere down the line, we'll probably build a new mission facility out of which the mission of the Kingdom, in one of its local expressions called Grace, will continue.
Musings on 25 Years of Ordained Ministry--14
Launching Grace--#2
I have been and remain a "fan" and supporter of the Church Growth Movement and the Seeker Movement. God is continually inviting the Church to be the Church for each new generation. My belief is that the CGM and the Seeker Movement were moves of God's Spirit calling the Church back to mission and evangelism. My generation, the Boomers, left the Church in droves because we found it boring and irrelevant. The Seeker/Church Growth Movement encouraged creative, Spirit-led thinking in how the Church could once again speak and share the Gospel in the language of the people.
Having said that, like Walt after his sabbatical, I began to sense that God was up to something new. And Grace offered the chance to begin to go in that new direction.
My passion for seekers remain. But in this particular time in this particular congregation I sense a mission different from that of the seeker movement I experienced at Joy:
From "Come and See" to "Go and Show." Certainly we want to invite people to come and see Jesus, including inviting them to see him in our worship services, etc. But increasingly people are staying away from churches so the Church needs to go to seekers. That lead to a major shift for us. Rather than building a church for seekers, per se, Grace is focused on building a congregation that disciples followers of Jesus to go back out and bring his grace to our corners of the world.
From "Seeker Services" to "Missional Worshipping Communities." Rather than designing the Sunday experience for those who've never been to church before as we did in the seeker services, our worship is now geared to those already committed to Jesus. Certainly we want to ensure that newcomers feel welcome, but the point is not to introduce people to Jesus though the service but to train/equip/inspire/empower Jesus followers to go back into the world to bring Jesus there. The service is far more participational than presentational. And the messages are more disciple-oriented (what it means to follow Jesus) than life application.
From "Programming" to "Communities." Rather than creating a busy church with lots of programs, we're keeping it simple by focusing on getting people into groups/clusters to share faith, build relationships, be Jesus to one another other, so we can then be Jesus in the world.
From "Presentational Evangelism" to "Hands on Mission." Again, rather than bringing people to worship to hear a presentation of the Gospel, we're headed back out to bring Jesus to people in tangible ways. That lead to our 4 Make A Difference Days, in which 4 times a year we go into the community to serve in a variety of ways from cleaning up a neighborhood to feeding the homeless to gleaning fruit to walks for certain causes. We're not being called to build a church but to serve a city.
From "Church Work" to the "Work of the Church." In the '80s and 90's it was all about getting everyone plugged into a ministry in the church. So the task of the staff/leadership was to help people discover their gifts and then put them into some kind of service opportunity at the church. And if a slot didn't exist, one would be created. The whole point was to serve each other and the church. We still have significant ministries within the congregation that need great leaders from caring for children to worship leadership. But our main task is to empower people not for church work but to do the work of the church--getting out and being Jesus. Part of this comes in helping Christians see their every day lives as God's calling for them: Their job is their ministry. Being a parent is their ministry. Volunteering for the PTA is their ministry. Being neighborly is their ministry.
One of the growth areas for me right now is learning how to disciple individuals.
We've learned a lot over the last 4 years about what it means to try to be a missional church. And we've got a lot more to learn. But I am constantly amazed at the ways in which the people of Grace are following Jesus on the bold, daring, reckless adventure of bringing grace to the world. It's been a huge stretch to move from a strong, passionate seeker/program-driven church to a missional community based church. But Gracer's have been up for it.
We also had the dream of being a world church--focused on the needs of people around the world. Hence our ministry with our friends in Rwanda, Haiti, Mexico, Bethlehem, in addition to local stuff.
One of the defining growth experiences for me came in October of 2008 when I visited the Vineyard Church in Boise for a conference they were doing on mission. Their whole congregation is focused on how Jesus speaks to the global issues of the day from the environment to hunger/poverty to sex-trafficking, to oppression. 25 years earlier I saw a picture of what Joy could be like when I visited Robert Schuller's congregation. This time, I saw a picture of what Grace can be like.
In the midst of all of that, our mantra is keep it simple, keep it significant, and keep it fun (not meaning that ministry is always happy and gooey sweet, but that we should sense a passion for whatever we're doing.)
We're only 4 years old but it's been quite a ride so far. As Walt always says, "The best is yet to be."
I have been and remain a "fan" and supporter of the Church Growth Movement and the Seeker Movement. God is continually inviting the Church to be the Church for each new generation. My belief is that the CGM and the Seeker Movement were moves of God's Spirit calling the Church back to mission and evangelism. My generation, the Boomers, left the Church in droves because we found it boring and irrelevant. The Seeker/Church Growth Movement encouraged creative, Spirit-led thinking in how the Church could once again speak and share the Gospel in the language of the people.
Having said that, like Walt after his sabbatical, I began to sense that God was up to something new. And Grace offered the chance to begin to go in that new direction.
My passion for seekers remain. But in this particular time in this particular congregation I sense a mission different from that of the seeker movement I experienced at Joy:
From "Come and See" to "Go and Show." Certainly we want to invite people to come and see Jesus, including inviting them to see him in our worship services, etc. But increasingly people are staying away from churches so the Church needs to go to seekers. That lead to a major shift for us. Rather than building a church for seekers, per se, Grace is focused on building a congregation that disciples followers of Jesus to go back out and bring his grace to our corners of the world.
From "Seeker Services" to "Missional Worshipping Communities." Rather than designing the Sunday experience for those who've never been to church before as we did in the seeker services, our worship is now geared to those already committed to Jesus. Certainly we want to ensure that newcomers feel welcome, but the point is not to introduce people to Jesus though the service but to train/equip/inspire/empower Jesus followers to go back into the world to bring Jesus there. The service is far more participational than presentational. And the messages are more disciple-oriented (what it means to follow Jesus) than life application.
From "Programming" to "Communities." Rather than creating a busy church with lots of programs, we're keeping it simple by focusing on getting people into groups/clusters to share faith, build relationships, be Jesus to one another other, so we can then be Jesus in the world.
From "Presentational Evangelism" to "Hands on Mission." Again, rather than bringing people to worship to hear a presentation of the Gospel, we're headed back out to bring Jesus to people in tangible ways. That lead to our 4 Make A Difference Days, in which 4 times a year we go into the community to serve in a variety of ways from cleaning up a neighborhood to feeding the homeless to gleaning fruit to walks for certain causes. We're not being called to build a church but to serve a city.
From "Church Work" to the "Work of the Church." In the '80s and 90's it was all about getting everyone plugged into a ministry in the church. So the task of the staff/leadership was to help people discover their gifts and then put them into some kind of service opportunity at the church. And if a slot didn't exist, one would be created. The whole point was to serve each other and the church. We still have significant ministries within the congregation that need great leaders from caring for children to worship leadership. But our main task is to empower people not for church work but to do the work of the church--getting out and being Jesus. Part of this comes in helping Christians see their every day lives as God's calling for them: Their job is their ministry. Being a parent is their ministry. Volunteering for the PTA is their ministry. Being neighborly is their ministry.
One of the growth areas for me right now is learning how to disciple individuals.
We've learned a lot over the last 4 years about what it means to try to be a missional church. And we've got a lot more to learn. But I am constantly amazed at the ways in which the people of Grace are following Jesus on the bold, daring, reckless adventure of bringing grace to the world. It's been a huge stretch to move from a strong, passionate seeker/program-driven church to a missional community based church. But Gracer's have been up for it.
We also had the dream of being a world church--focused on the needs of people around the world. Hence our ministry with our friends in Rwanda, Haiti, Mexico, Bethlehem, in addition to local stuff.
One of the defining growth experiences for me came in October of 2008 when I visited the Vineyard Church in Boise for a conference they were doing on mission. Their whole congregation is focused on how Jesus speaks to the global issues of the day from the environment to hunger/poverty to sex-trafficking, to oppression. 25 years earlier I saw a picture of what Joy could be like when I visited Robert Schuller's congregation. This time, I saw a picture of what Grace can be like.
In the midst of all of that, our mantra is keep it simple, keep it significant, and keep it fun (not meaning that ministry is always happy and gooey sweet, but that we should sense a passion for whatever we're doing.)
We're only 4 years old but it's been quite a ride so far. As Walt always says, "The best is yet to be."
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